No Matter
by fluffy2001
Summary: Third installment of the series that started with A House Assessment and Adverse Conditions. Immediately after the shooting, the ducklings have to deal with the pressures of carrying on the department. Chase centric, but good drama.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I don't own any of these characters. Don't sue!**

**Here I freaking go again! I don't know where these ideas keep coming, but they are a flowin. This is third installment of the series that started with A House Assessment and Adverse Conditions. Those two stories took place pre No Reason, this one is post No Reason taking place immediately after the shooting. For those that didn't read the previous two stories, Chase is now an attending in the Diagnostics department and handling cases on his own. This is a look of how the team handles the pressures of the department in this alternate scenario without House. **

No one can ever anticipate how they will react under such a horrific circumstance. Medically, adrenaline takes over and all rational thought and awareness of time disappears in a flash. In that split second the heart rate quickens, the pupils dilate, blood vessels constrict and dilate, and the blood sugar elevates.

The sad reality is that the years of trauma and crisis training still cannot prepare a high skilled physician to properly react the exact second the boss gets unexpectedly blown away during a routine meeting in the usually safe surroundings of the diagnostics conference room. Adrenaline might push one forward, but it doesn't give that person the ability to act rationally and think clearly.

They didn't remember their thoughts, their feelings, and their reactions or even how much time had elapsed. They just remembered that brief moment as the assailant stood pointing a gun at them before delivering another blow. All they could do for those few seconds was watch while their mentor lay bleeding on the floor. They needed that moment though, because without it the adrenaline rush would have prevented rational action, which would have seemed kind of foolish for three highly skilled medical professionals. That brief pause offered all the time they needed to get their bearings about them and ride off the initial impact of the shock. Once the gunman was gone, the reaction of the well trained trauma expert could happen. It was now an easy mode to slip into as it offered the much needed comfort and rationality in this moment of intense madness.

House first tried to get up, and then wisely went back down knowing that the extra effort would increase the already rapid blood loss. Chase and Foreman rushed over well knowing that every second from this point forward was critical. Chase examined the abdomen while Foreman checked the neck. Stabilizing the patient so he could be moved was now the only goal.

Cameron went straight to the phone, first calling the ER and then Cuddy. There was no time to think about how or why this happened. She would have rather tended to House than make the calls, but she completely trusted Chase and Foreman. At that moment, she had to.

The events that followed were a frantic blur. In a matter of minutes the trauma team was there with the gurney. Chase and Foreman managed to slow the bleeding, but the ER could only do the rest. After all, who would have ever thought that life saving supplies would ever be needed in a medical conference room? Quickly the medics took House away and the ducklings all followed. Their thoughts were still solely focused on the welfare of the patient. They couldn't process anything else.

Once the moment of madness was over though, the shock and dismay of the incident now reared its ugly head. The three of them all sat in stunned silence in the ER lobby, all lost in their own thoughts. The terror of the situation now was a little too real. "Dr. Wilson," said Cameron. "I need to let him know."

"No need," said a voice from behind her. They all turned around to notice a somber and very rattled Wilson who just left the ER trauma area.

"He's on his way up now," Wilson continued. "They are pretty optimistic. Luckily he happened to get shot in front of some highly skilled doctors."

"Are you okay?" asked a concerned Cameron as she got up to offer comfort to a shaken Wilson.

"I should be asking all of you," he said. "I didn't get the shock of seeing it happen."

Chase and Foreman were both very quiet. They were at a complete loss. Foreman tried to answer, but he didn't know what to say. Cameron decided to speak for all of them. "We are too stunned right now. We need a little time to make sense of this."

"Since it doesn't make sense, I wouldn't waste your time," Wilson replied. "I'm going up to the OR to observe. All of you are welcome to join me."

They all looked at each other with blank stares, waiting for the first person to make a move. Cameron flashed a look of quick disappointment and started following Wilson. Chase and Foreman got up and followed right behind.

-----------------

All three ducklings anxiously gathered in Cuddy's office early the next morning. To say that Cuddy looked like a wreck would be an understatement. A more apt description would reflect someone who had to toil amidst horrific and hazardous conditions to find a safe haven and sanity all while being deprived of sleep. She looked and felt like a weary hurricane survivor.

"Dr. Cuddy," said Foreman, "You need to go home and get some sleep."

"Trust me, its happening, just as soon as I tie up some loose ends. You three don't get any looser." she replied.

"We'll be able to manage," said Cameron. "We have enough to keep us busy."

"Sure, tell me, how much sleep did you three get last night?" They all looked at Cuddy glassy eyed, confirming her suspicion. "Right, about as much as I did. I need to make sure you all will be able to handle department business since I will be gone for several hours and your supervisor will be out for a while."

"Before we get to that, can you tell us how House is?" asked Cameron.

"He had a bad night, which leads to the part about my instructions for the day. Chase, House needs the care of an Intensivist so the choice is obvious. Because he still isn't quite stable, I need you to constantly watch him today. The ICU knows you will be there all day. Cameron and Foreman, you will do your normal clinic duties and continue with your case, swollen tongue guy."

The ducklings all looked at Cuddy strangely. They never heard her use a House pet name for a patient before.

"Sorry," apologized Cuddy. "In his delirious state House asked about Harpo, the swollen tongue guy. I guess it stuck. Anyway, Chase is now supervising the case so get him to sign off on any procedures. Don't discuss the case in front of House. No humoring him today, no matter how much he badgers."

"Shouldn't be much of an issue," said Chase. "He'll still be sedated most of the day."

"He has special pain management issues," Cuddy told Chase. "I left some instructions in the file, but I trust you will know what to do. I don't want to see him build up a dependence on morphine like he has with vicodin."

Chase silently concurred with her statement.

"Okay, I'll touch base again tomorrow but for right now it will be business as usual. We just have a different attending in charge right now." Cuddy threw Chase a glance indicating she expected nothing but the best from him. "All of you will report to me until House gets back. Unless it involves life or death though, I don't need to hear from any you today. Chase, I'll check in with you later."

Cuddy gave them a weary but commanding look that they were dismissed. "Thank you Dr. Cuddy," they all said in off timing as they began to leave.

In the hallway the three stopped for a small conference. "I'll get right to work on our patient," said Foreman, eagerly looking for a distraction.

"If its okay," said Cameron, "I'd like to go with Chase to check on House. I won't be long."

Foreman nodded. "Okay, I'll go get started."

They all parted in their respective directions. "So how are you doing today?" Chase asked Cameron with an exhausted but concerned demeanor.

"I'm okay. What happened just hasn't sunk in yet. I'm rather worried about House."

"He'll be fine," assured Chase.

"Physically, yes, he'll recover. I'm not sure how he will take the rest of it though. Wilson said he had a bad recovery emotionally over his leg. I wonder how he will handle this."

"That recovery involved the break up with the love of his life and a major physical deformity. This one should be easier to swallow."

Cameron flashed a sad smile. She knew Chase was likely right but she couldn't shake her concern. "Yes, you are probably right. I'm worried anyway. That is my nature."

-------------

Cameron and Chase noticed the peaceful resting soul when they entered the ICU. Not House, he looked uncomfortable. It was Wilson, slumped in the less than cozy chair next to the bed covered partially by his jacket. Judging by the bags under his eyes, he had not been in his slumber for long. They quietly began to examine House in hopes of letting Wilson continue to sleep.

"House is somewhat restless and feeling a bit of pain," whispered Chase, "but he is showing slight improvement."

Cameron continued to gaze at House with intense concern. She so wanted to help and comfort him, but she knew there was nothing more she could do. "He looks like hell," she told Chase.

The talking in the room was enough for Wilson to abruptly pop up in the chair. As he shook off the sleepy feeling, he noticed Cameron and Chase.

"Good morning Dr. Wilson," Chase said with a smile.

"How is he doing?" Wilson asked.

"Better," replied Chase. "He is still in some pain, but he is well sedated and vitals are improved over last night."

"Yeah, he had a rough one. He crashed twice." Wilson paused to stare at his fallen friend. Here they were again. How was House always getting himself into these messes? How was he going to have to help his pal through this one? Wilson then shook himself out of his deep thought. "So I assume you are the Intensivist Cuddy assigned. She didn't say who it was earlier, but I figured the choice was obvious."

"Go home and get some sleep. I'll take care of him today," said Chase.

"No, I'll be on my office couch. I have some business to tend to later. Page me if anything changes." Wilson quickly left, knowing that his lingering presence was not good for anybody at this time.

Cameron turned to Chase, still showing the enduring look of worry in her eyes. "I better go help Foreman. Please let me know also if anything changes."

"I'll add you and Dr. Wilson to the list of twenty I already have to notify," replied Chase. He turned to House. "Here that House? Change your condition and you will cause me lots of grief. Hard to pass up that one."

Cameron smiled and left. Chase took a deep breath of relief and sank down in the chair previously occupied by Wilson. He examined the chart and then fixed an uncertain gaze at his semi-placid boss. "You are always full or surprises. I'd be bored working for anyone else."

--------------

Hours later Chase was trying to keep busy by checking vitals and recording results. He was mad at himself for not thinking to bring the book of crosswords.

"Chase?" asked a very groggy voice, "What are you feeding my rat?" Chase wasn't sure if anyone thought to check on Steve McQueen, but he would have to mention it to Wilson. "Steve!" House then shouted to an empty corner in the room. "What did you get into? Rats can't grow six feet tall."

"House," said Chase as he fixed his eyes squarely on House's, "Nothing is there." An incoherent House looked at Chase, then glanced back in the corner.

"Oh," he softly mumbled then quickly fell back into to sleep.

"Not good," Chase muttered to himself. He sent a page to Cuddy. _He's hallucinating_ was the message. About five minutes later another page came back to Chase. _My office, 20 minutes._

-----------------

Chase sat in Cuddy's office waiting for her to arrive. Something wasn't quite right here and he used the time to ponder exactly what it could be. After a few minutes though he realized that any type of wild speculation was an exercise in futility. With House, anything was possible.

Cuddy finally arrived. She resembled someone who was just dragged out of bed. Her hair was messy, her makeup was left over from the previous day and she had on very casual clothes that seemed to be quickly thrown on without much thought. Clearly she didn't plan on staying long, and whatever she was about to say was very important.

"Sorry I'm late," she told Chase as she walked in and shut the office door behind her. Her usual commanding presence was absent as she sauntered behind her desk and slumped wearily into her very comfortable executive chair.

"You aren't late," replied Chase. "You really didn't have to come in."

"Yes, I did. What I'm about to tell you is only known by the anesthesiologist, the surgeon, myself and Dr. Wilson. You cannot share this with anyone. During the surgery, we gave House ketamine and put him in a coma."

"That was a ketamine coma?" asked a very shocked Chase. "Why?"

She stared at Chase, knowing he could easily figure out why once he was given a brief moment to think about it.

"I know his pain has been significantly worse lately," observed Chase. "Ketamine sounds like a risky and reckless House idea. I heard him briefly mention it before losing consciousness. How could he convince you to do it? He didn't have the time or the coherence to argue."

"He talked to me about it before the shooting," replied Cuddy. "I have been treating him for his increased leg pain for a few months now. He saw these promising studies and wanted to take the risk. I wouldn't let him."

"But you let him now, after multiple gun shot wounds?" asked an incredulous Chase.

"It was the ideal opportunity. He had to go under and ketamine is a safe anesthetic."

"Safe, but not legal," Chase added.

"It is legal in an experimental trial. I have all the notes for the experimental procedure in my desk. Let's just say he was approved."

"The side effects though. They can be pretty extreme."

"I know the risks and so does he. I also know that something had to be done. He recently started shooting morphine."

Chase was stunned by her revelation. _How could House be such an idiot?_ He slowly sank into the couch as the intense disbelief over all the recent events began to hit him. He wasn't sure how many more surprises he could take. "How do you know this?" he asked. "House would never tell you. He'd lose his job and his license."

"Wilson figured it out," admitted Cuddy. "He even found the private stash."

Chase rubbed his tired eyes trying desperately to process all that was happening. "Well," he said with his eyes still buried in his hands, "that certainly explains the rough night. He was having violent outbursts, wasn't he? How much longer is he going to drift between realities?"

"I'm not sure. That is why I need you to keep a careful watch on him today."

"You were just hoping that I wouldn't notice things like hallucinations and violent behavior?"

"I was hoping those side effects were only temporary and wouldn't last this long," answered Cuddy. "I hoped wrong. You just need to watch him for a few more hours. Wilson will be there to relieve you later."

"How long do we have to keep this up?"

"As long as it takes. No one else can know about this, especially Cameron and Foreman. The less people that know about the situation the better."

Chase stood silently, still heavily pensive over the task ahead.

"Call me if there are problems. I'm counting on you Chase."

He nodded and quietly headed back to the ICU.

**a/n: The premise here is that Chase, Cuddy, and Wilson end up with their hands rather full, so Cameron and Foreman have to pretty much do everything by themselves. Cameron will be getting a case out of this. There will also be the drama of the House crisis. I still have a bit to work out, so let me know how much you like or dislike what I have so far and if the premise is promising. Thanks for reading!**


	2. Chapter 2

How can I be expected keep up like this?

_Doctors are supposed to avert all evil, heal the sick and wounded, and never show an ounce of shaken confidence. An accomplished physician should have the natural ability to bounce from crisis to crisis much like a superhero with daring resolve._

Why am I not allowed to curl up in the corner and cry? I'm so very tired. Tired of fighting; tired of life.

_It's all in a days work. Terror and fear should roll off the crisis specialist like water on a duck's back. Nerves of steel must dominate when being constantly pelted with one life-threatening emergency after another. _

I need time to reflect and recover from heartache. No one should have to see a beloved colleague go down like that.

_A doctor must perform such heroics on little sleep since illness never rests. Life always depends on a physician's instinct for quick action, as there is still a world that must be saved. _

Who's going to save us?

Cameron intensely pondered the unsettling argument going on in her head while she and Foreman silently waited in an unfamiliar conference room for Chase to arrive. It was likely the reaction of a tired mind, but nonetheless she couldn't turn off her thinking.

"You ever been in this room before?" asked Foreman, feeling a little uncomfortable with the new surroundings.

"No," replied Cameron. "It will do for now."

They both continued to stare quietly at the different set of walls and windows, wondering if they would notice anything unique about them. They didn't.

------------------

Chase wandered aimlessly through the hall somewhat certain that he knew where the conference room was. He was too tired to picture its exact location so he hoped by chance he would find it by walking around. Cuddy had arranged this new location since their room was still taped off. He was glad they were somewhere else since he wasn't ready to go back. The bloodstains in the carpet would aggravate the still fresh memories of the shooting.

He felt his eyes burning as he tried to read the office numbers. As soon as he was done with Cameron and Foreman he was going home. He had to be back very early to relieve Cuddy and his brain couldn't function anymore.

Eventually Chase found the room in the manner as predicted; by chance. As he entered, his body language provided full indication of how completely drained he was from the events of the past day. He sat down very slowly and planted his head down onto the table. "Please don't tell me anything that would make my brain explode," he said talking into the solid surface that supported him.

"How's House?" asked an anxious Cameron

"There are complications," replied Chase as he lifted his weary head up and covered his worn eyes with his hand. "He is having pain issues, which is causing some restlessness. Wilson is with him now, and Cuddy will be in later."

"Is there anything we can do to help?" Cameron said with pleading eyes.

"No, Cuddy needs you both to handle our patients."

"Come on, I could really help. I'm willing to do it in my off hours." Cameron was rather close to begging.

"You will have to take it up with Cuddy. I have no say in House's care." Chase knew it was best to divert the discussion to the task at hand. They needed to get through this. "How's Harpo?"

"I thought you didn't want any news that would make your head explode," replied Foreman.

"That bad, huh?" Chase replied.

"Blood and urine tests for infections were negative, his tongue is swollen worse and now he has some intercranial pressure. Can't do an LP."

Chase was afraid that complications would arise. He had really hoped that this one time House only took the case for pure amusement. "I have a little time. What say we try a differential diagnosis?"

Everyone agreed, as they needed to fall back into familiar patterns. They started firing off one idea after another so fast it was hard to tell who was suggesting and who was refuting. _Bleeding disorder. _Which one? _Granulomatosis_. We already gave him prednisone and his lungs are fine._ Hemolytic Anemia? _His spleen is fine. _Worm infections? _Those usually show up in the intestine, but it is possible. _Lupus? _This would be the strangest case of Lupus we've ever seen. _Toxicosis From Pesticides? _Most of those symptoms show damage to internal organs. We don't see any of that.

All of a sudden, they all stopped at once and shared disappointed looks. In the time that they fired off symptoms, none of them could process an alternate suggestion or dictate related conditions off the top of their heads. Their mentor wasn't there to corral their notions or tell them how misguided they were. The most crucial piece of their process was missing.

"It just doesn't work, does it?" observed Cameron.

"Look, its okay to be rattled about this." Foreman said. "Personally, I'm still freaked out. We just need a little more time to regroup."

"So what do we do next?" Cameron asked.

"I vote for a lymph node biopsy of the jaw," said Foreman.

Cameron and Chase took a moment to ponder the suggestion. They didn't have the frame of mind to rapidly process other suggestions.

"One of us needs to be responsible for making the final decisions for this patient," said Chase. "I might be listed as the primary attending, but I can't give him the attention he needs. Foreman, I like your idea. The case is yours."

Foreman nodded in agreement. "I'll go talk to our patient about the procedure."

Cameron was stunned by Chase's quick decision. What gave him the right? She waited until Foreman was out of sight to voice her objections.

"Why Foreman?" asked Cameron.

"He had an idea and he has proven himself running cases before."

"That makes him a better choice?"

Chase stopped for a second, knowing that he better choose his words carefully. He was so not in the mood for this now. "I need someone I can rely on. I might not be his or your supervisor, but if anything goes wrong with the case it will be my fault."

"So you don't trust me?" Cameron asked now using a dejected tone.

"I backed myself into that one," Chase said under his breath. "Of course I trust you. It's not that. Everything is out of control right now and I need someone who has been through this before. I'm not going to have time to help or supervise."

"I want the next case," Cameron declared adamantly.

"Are you sure you want that?" asked a skeptical Chase. "There is no one to fall back on so you would be responsible for the consequences. I can't promise anything though. I would have to take it up with Cuddy."

"Did Cuddy approve Foreman taking a case?"

"No, but I know she wouldn't disapprove. She knows Foreman is reliable."

"She doesn't think the same of me though," Cameron whined. "Of course not. She didn't when Foreman was chosen to supervise House."

"Be very careful about what you say. I wouldn't use that tone and defensive attitude when talking to Cuddy. She will rip you to shreds." Chase advised. "Look, you are tired and stressed. We all are. Go home and get some sleep and we can discuss this tomorrow when we are fresh."

Cameron was too upset to accept his shallow advice and stormed out of the office with a deep scowl on her face. Chase thought sleep was an excellent suggestion himself and he was going to take it. He quickly left their temporary locale and headed straight for home.

-------------------------

Foreman looked at the time. He had easily lost track. How could he not, there were so many distractions today. He quickly opened his cell phone and selected the number to dial.

"I'm so sorry. I guess doing anything on time is a hazard of the profession...

My boss? He's having some problems, but still hanging in there. Anyway, I was assigned a case today. I'm running a few hours behind, but I'll still be available...

So you can stay tonight? You don't know how happy that makes me. Just let yourself in if I'm not home yet. I'll really try to make sure that I'm there first...

Have a safe drive from Cherry Hill. I have something special but low key planned for this evening. I can't wait to see you."

He closed his cell phone with a joyful smile and sparkle in his eyes. He felt really lucky that she could make it on such short notice. He really needed something to take his mind off things.

_--------------------------_

_**He who learns must suffer. And even in our sleep pain that cannot forget falls by drop upon the heart, and in our own despair, against our will, comes wisdom to us by the awful grace of God.**_

_Aeschylus said that in the times before Christ, long before you devoted your entire life to the avoidance of pain. It has always existed and we should embrace the learning opportunities it brings. But alas, pain is a human quality. When shutting off humanity, you tried to shut off the pain as well. _

_Despite what you might believe I know that your pain does not define you. You really don't wish for it or want it. Avoiding the pain means avoiding the reality, and that seems to suit you just fine. How long though before all the isolation consumes you? It likely already has. That brilliant mind rests inside an eggshell of a human being and your life is now just one giant science experiment. Even though you know logically there is no quick fix, no button, no trigger, your life now depends on the hope that there is. Why do you think you are above the lessons of time?_

_As long as I have known you, you have always seen yourself above everything almost as if you were a God. Seeing the humanity in others meant that you would have to see the humanity in yourself. That couldn't happen though, because then you would have to admit you were flawed. You believed you were flawless in every way until the infarction. Your brilliance, your gifts, your insight were tarnished by the very real human condition of a bum leg. Even the slightest hint that you were actually a mere mortal was more than you could bear._

_There are days where I actually think you wish for death. You have been dead before and were nonchalant about the mere idea of a life after death experience. Deep in your heart though, you knew it was real. You brushed away the thought like everything else because otherwise you couldn't ignore how real it was. And how comforting. You don't want comfort though, you want truth. There is no bigger truth than all living creatures die. Death is the final word but I'm certain you'd rather that word come from you. Death is the most desperate cure for pain. _

Wilson was suddenly jolted out of his deep reflection by the loud beeping. "Not again," he said as he observed the monitor. Tachycardia. This time though, it was due to House thrashing about with his wires and tubes trying desperately to get out of bed. "Don't do this," Wilson said as he rushed over to restrain him.

"I cannot be harmed!" House shouted. "Go ahead, take another shot. I will never go down!" Wilson knew to hold back his arms, but the right one broke loose and that gave House enough momentum to shove forward. However, he still had quite a bit of muscle rigidity so the weakness and off balance force propelled him straight to the floor. There he struggled like a fish out of water. Wilson pushed the emergency call button and the crash team arrived.

"Tachycardia. He could be going into cardiac arrest."

"Get him some oxygen, fast!" the nurse shouted. They tried to hook up the mask while House was still on the floor, but he fiercely resisted. Then, all of a sudden, the will to fight was gone. His eyes rolled back and then closed.

The monitor started beeping wildly indicating they were now facing a more serious problem. "He's down!"

Wilson stood back and let the crash team do their part. This has happened before and he knew House would get through this. He was obviously still too weak to physically handle the violent outbursts and frequent tachycardia caused by the ketamine.

Wilson was quickly proven right. It only took one shock and House was back in normal sinus rhythm. Luckily whatever happened, it wasn't too bad. Still, it was rather alarming to watch.

Cuddy arrived just as they were lifting House back into the bed. "Another outburst?" asked a distressed Cuddy.

Wilson looked at her with his sullen face and nodded. "This time he had a sense of invulnerability."

"He still has typical side effects. We need to give him more time." Cuddy said softly so only Wilson would hear.

"Yes, but how long can we keep this up before drawing suspicion?" Wilson whispered as he guided Cuddy to a remote part of the room. "You and I have departments to run. We can't keep devoting 8 hours of our day to watching him. Chase doesn't have the time either since you have him doing House's job. You know as well as I do no matter how much work House avoided he still had his fair share. This can go on for a day, or it could go on for a few weeks."

Cuddy looked at him frustrated because there were no other options. "Let's give it another day," she pleaded. "If there is no improvement, we'll bring in some other people we can trust. We cannot let this get out, no matter what. If the wrong people get word about his issues they will use it against him."

Wilson stared at Cuddy with his trademark look that combined protest with panic wrapped with emotional restraint. "People we can trust. I only count two, Cameron and Foreman."

"Yes," said Cuddy. "I'll be back to relieve you in a few hours. If we are still in this mess same time tomorrow, I'll call a meeting."

Cuddy clomped away in her stiletto heels, leaving Wilson to contemplate the fate of his fallen friend yet again. "Hear that, you get to spend the evening with a hot chick. That sounds better than my plans," he told House as he sat back down beside him.

**A/N: Be a little patient with me for the first few chapters. They set a somber mood as they reflect the adjustment period for everyone. I have some great ideas that will change the pace of the story later. Thanks for reading!**


	3. Chapter 3

_Everyone thinks I'm the craziest person alive. I spend so much of my time bailing you out of one situation after another and letting you get away with things that would have kicked doctors out of practice long ago. People don't understand why in the world I do it. I'm not sure I even understand. Aside from prolonging an otherwise exceptional medical career, I don't think I have really helped you at all. I have enabled you. I probably do it partially out of guilt. I'm the one that screwed up with your leg. I'm the one that sent you spiraling into self-pity and drug addiction. Sure, you forgave me; you told me it is the nature of medicine to screw up. I'm not sure I have ever forgiven myself though._

_Despite your brilliance, you have become a much better doctor since you found your current team. You have grown to rely on all of them and are desperately trying to hold on. I often wonder if you cling to them because they are your last hope of not losing complete touch with reality. That has to be it. Otherwise, why would you fight so hard to keep Chase? Sure, he was the first person to actually survive two years with you, but you went to huge lengths to secure him a position even though you never indicated there was any respect. You do not perform such acts because of loyalty. _

_Without your team and Wilson we would have lost you long ago. Maybe it wasn't enough. Maybe we lost you already. _

"Dr. Cuddy?"

Cuddy snapped out of her thought to see Dr. Brown, a pediatric attending.

"Yes, Dr. Brown," Cuddy replied.

"How's Dr. House?" she asked.

"He's doing much better, but I have a feeling that you didn't come here to ask me that."

"I have a patient that needs your attention. Actually, this is perfect for House's team, but I didn't want to go straight to them given the circumstances."

Cuddy grabbed the file and started examining it. Her mouth hung open as she read the lurid details. "Why does the family want to do this?"

"They are clinging to hope that there is a small chance. It's not my job to convince them otherwise, at least not until all possibilities have been considered."

"Okay," Cuddy agreed. "I'll talk to Dr. Chase in the morning."

"Thanks Dr. Cuddy," Dr. Brown said. She left the ICU with an overwhelmed Cuddy still holding the file.

"You are one incredibly lucky bastard," Cuddy said to House.

_--------------------_

Chase arrived in the ICU the next morning to find Cuddy buried behind a huge stack of papers and files.

"I suppose taking a night shift is a great way to get work done," he said as she was too involved to notice his arrival.

"You will have to try it," she replied. "Your department's paperwork is starting to stack up. You will be wishing for this opportunity."

Chase walked over to the bed and stared at a peacefully unconscious House. He had to admit, he was looking much better. He picked up House's chart and examined it. "I see he had an excellent night."

"Yes, he didn't stir once and vitals are stronger," Cuddy said as she got up. "He sorely needed this." She looked at Chase with all indication that she was about to tell him something, but then she stopped herself.

"Is there something you need to tell me?" Chase asked.

Cuddy decided she might as well just get it out. "I hate to do this to you, but you have a new case."

Cuddy's statement got a rise out of Chase. "You can't expect us to do this. We can barely handle the case we have now, we are already down the most pivotal member of our team, we have one doctor who still is unable to perform delicate medical procedures, and I'm in the ICU most of the day. We will likely do in whoever you are giving us."

"She's already done in," replied a solemn Cuddy as she handed over the file. "She has a bullet lodged deep in her frontal lobe. Hope of even a modest recovery is slim."

Chase opened the file, very curious as to why they would be getting such a case. His heart sunk as he read the information. The team has had to endure so much already so he wasn't sure how ready they were for this. "She's only eleven. She's dying of something other than a bullet in her brain?"

"The family has hope of recovery, even if it is remote. They have asked for heroic measures. We don't get more heroic that our diagnostics team."

"We are already riding on fumes here. Our trademark hero is having his own issues with bullets these days." Chase protested.

"Where do you stand with your current patient?" Cuddy asked.

"I gave the case to Foreman. He arranged a lymph node biopsy and we are waiting for the results."

"Give this case to Cameron then. I'll take full responsibility for her. You will be the primary attending but you have my word that I will take full responsibility if anything goes wrong."

"So you want her to run a "girl in a coma under tragic circumstances" case after the trauma of her boss getting shot in front of her, not to mention all the other turmoil over the last few months. That has emotional disaster written all over it."

"I'm willing to take that risk. Come on, heroic measures aside, we aren't exactly going to be improving this girl's quality of life. Cameron is the only doctor left who can take this. Think of it this way, this will be a great opportunity for her to prove House wrong."

"Or right," countered Chase. "Not dead is a quality of life improvement. We should to at least go for that."

"I wonder myself if that is for the best, but luckily it's not up to me to decide."

"Be careful, because if Cameron is left to choose, you might not like the end result."

"Let's hope it doesn't come to that," replied Cuddy. "If it does, I'm sure you and Foreman will help her make the right decision. Anyway, as soon as Cameron and Foreman get in you can go discuss this with them. I'll cover for you"

---------------------------------------------

Cameron and Chase waited patiently in their temporary space for Foreman to arrive. Chase was involved with reviewing and signing a stack of files that were patiently waiting for him this morning. "I see you took my advice," he said to Cameron.

"I did sleep well, but I would have done that without your advice. You check on House this morning?"

"Yes, he had a very good night. Things are looking up."

A deep expression of relief fell over Cameron. "I wonder where Foreman is. He is never late."

A few minutes later, a very happy Foreman arrived. His face wore a huge smile and he was humming something unrecognizable to himself.

"Wow someone had a good evening," said Cameron. "Why are you so happy?"

"Isn't it obvious?" said Chase. "He got laid."

"Well it figures you would know that," Cameron snarked. "So, who is she Foreman?"

"Not telling. Let's just say a friend." Foreman then looked at Chase very strangely. "I don't ever remember House having that much paperwork."

"Neither do I," replied Chase. "I checked it over though and it's all legit. I'll have to get his secret when he comes to. Anyway, now that you are here, we have a new case."

"You were crazy enough to take another case?" asked Cameron.

"This came from Cuddy herself, and it is officially yours." Chase handed the file over to Cameron.

At first Cameron had a look of pleasant surprise on her face, and then she started reading the file. Her face changed to a look of deep heartbreak for the patient. "This is tragic. She and a cousin were playing with a loaded gun. The poor family."

Cameron took a second to pull herself together and then examined the issues further. "Fever, chills, mouth ulcers, low white count, unusual redness and swelling around her gunshot wound. Sounds like neutropenia. Of course why she would have that from a bullet to the brain is beyond me."

Foreman got very curious. "Let me see that," he said to Cameron and reached for the file.

"She had a subdural hematoma and developed tension pneumocephalus. They did a ventriculostomy. She has no hope of normal brain function, but judging by what they have done she shouldn't be developing any hematological disorders or blood infections."

"It could have been a parasite that was there before her wound," Cameron responded. She got the file back from Foreman and shook her head. "I understand the parents' need to keep their daughter alive, but it is possible the body doesn't want to fight anymore. I'll get another CBC and an ANC. I'll also try to get a deeper patient history."

"How about your patient?" Chase asked Foreman.

"Still waiting for the biopsy results, but his fever is down to 101. That is something."

"Okay, I'll be in the ICU most of the day along with this stack of files," Chase said as he quickly wrapped up the meeting. "Let me know any test results as soon as you get them. If you need me for anything, I will make the time."

As they were leaving Cameron decided to follow along with Chase. "Thanks for giving me a chance," she said with a look of gratitude.

"Thank Cuddy. It was her idea. I know you can do it but don't think you are in this alone. Please don't hesitate to ask for help."

"I won't hesitate," Cameron said as she went in the direction of her new patient's room.

----------------

_I'm not ending up like you. Sure, I have had to cut myself off emotionally in many ways but for me, it was a survival instinct. For you, it had less to do with survival. Or did it? Where along the way did you shut people out? What led you to believe that time shouldn't be wasted on emotional impact and feelings because they can't be measured scientifically? What instability in your life caused behavior that is considered to be sociopathic in some ways? _

_My dad was the same type of sociopath._ _He never cared about his family or what really mattered. No, he did exactly what mattered to him. Being a brilliant doctor was all he wanted to do. How does a man like that even consider having a wife and a child? Was it for status? For legacy? Was it an accident? At least you were smart enough to realize that if you were going to be screwed up you weren't going to let others get close enough to make them suffer too. At least not a wife and child. _

_I have no idea why you hired me. Sure, I was furious at my dad for calling and asking you to consider my application. He had no right and he wouldn't have found out if a doctor friend of his that I stupidly used as a reference told him. That call only got you to look at the application. What did you see that I still to this day do not see in myself? Maybe you saw that I was miserable like you, that I shut out pain in the same way, by not caring. Maybe you liked the internal conflict between the good pious seminary student and the sycophant doctor living the wild and fast life. You have a strange fascination for those that are damaged and leading double lives. We aren't boring. _

_The question should be, why did I choose you? What did I think I would get out of this? This fellowship was sure to make me a better doctor. Was that what I really wanted? I guess I have never really wanted anything. Everything I do is by reaction. I have explored the good and I have explored the bad. Neither is fun. You have been accused of not being able to tell right from wrong. I know it isn't true for we are both alike there too. We can tell the difference but most of the time we don't give a damn. _

_People don't like you. That's okay, they don't like me either. I wonder if in 20 years I turn as abrasive and cranky as you. I doubt it, since I have been trained since birth to bite my tongue when thinking bad thoughts. I'll never be able to overcome that. Maybe that was a big reason for wanting to work with you. I admire anyone that can be so straight-forward and not be afraid of the consequences. Oh Christ, my dad was that way with people. Could it be all along I wanted to work for my dad and saw how much you were like him? No, I'll never be able to accept that. _

"Chase?" the voice asked.

Chase sprung out of his deep reminisce to notice House looking at him with a bleary gaze.

"You aren't seeing giant rats, are you?" Chase asked.

"Sure, I'm looking at you, aren't I?"

Chase smiled. House is having a good moment right now.

"Something isn't right. I'm experiencing symptoms that are usually not related to gunshot wounds." House said with a dry voice that hadn't been worked much for a few days.

"I'll let Cuddy talk to you. She knows the whole story."

"Don't give me that. You are a rather good doctor or I wouldn't have hired you. You know exactly what is going on. Afraid of hurting Cuddy's feelings?"

"You were given ketamine," Chase replied. He knew by this point that it was never beneficial to keep the truth from House.

"So you are my babysitter then. When is Wilson's turn?"

"In a few hours,"

"I'm going back to sleep. I already survived bullets; I don't want to die of boredom talking with you." House then drifted back to sleep

Chase had a deep breath of relief. House was sounding like himself again.

**A/N: The plot should start to move a little more from this point. House starts getting stronger and will be causing trouble for everyone. Thanks for reading! For those Chase and Cuddy fans out there, are the moments of internal reflection satisfying? **


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: I wrote chapter 4 and 5 together and had to split them up since they were so large. Treat them essentially as one continuous chapter. I'm trying a different writing approach with the dialogue. Hopefully that makes the conversations less choppy. If it is noticeable in a positive or negative way, please let me know. I strive to be better. Happy reading!**

Paperwork at first provided a nice mindless distraction, but after a few hours it started killing brain cells. Chase had to stop. He couldn't believe how much time he was putting into reviewing and signing files. He had to read and sign clinic discharge summaries, insurance forms verifying diagnosis, verification of lab results, requests for histories and so forth. These files were only a few days old too so it was not like he was taking over what House avoided. How in the world did House do all this?

"She has severe neutropenia. ANC count was way below 500." Cameron handed him a paper with the results, all while looking agitated.

"Is something wrong?" Chase noticed Cameron's off behavior.

"Her family. They never once got off their knees. They prayed the entire time I was performing the tests."

Chase smiled at her aggravation. "They need their faith in time like this."

"You holy rollers are all alike," Cameron snipped. "I wouldn't come out of the coma if my family was like that."

"So what are you going to do now?"

"Treat the neutropenia, and then try to find what in the world caused it."

"Neutropenia is commonly caused by other treatments." A familiar voice echoed from the other side of the room. "I take it she hasn't had leukemia, aplastic anemia or tuberculosis."

"House," Chase intervened, "You are staying out of this one. Cameron has it under control."

"Great, now I'm really worried. Let me see the chart."

"Say goodbye Dr. Cameron." Chase whisked her out of the room.

"He's doing great." Cameron smiled. "Maybe a consult will help him feel better."

"Cuddy's orders. Do not discuss anything patient related. Anyway, he still needs rest. You can stop by later if you want."

"Okay, back to the land of salvation." Cameron commented sarcastically.

"Tell the man upstairs I said hello." Chase was having fun with her torment.

---------------

A contingent of people were in the room at all times, all there to offer group prayer and comfort. The only person that was designated to talk about the medical issues was the mother. Apparently the father was a stepfather and had no legal rights.

"Mrs. Harris, your daughter is suffering from neutropenia." Cameron interrupted the prayer ritual to deliver the diagnosis.

"Is that some sort of infection?"

"It is a blood disorder that affects the body's ability to fight an infection. It affects the white count. I will treat it with corticosteroids but I have to warn you, this condition leaves her very prone to other infections. We also don't know what caused it to begin with, so there are many risks of infection right now."

"Do whatever you must to treat her. You have no objections from me. I trust that you will find the problem."

Cameron gave a sigh of relief. So far no trouble regarding the course of action.

"Once she has been treated for this, I want you to figure out how to get her out of the coma." The mother didn't hesitate at all with her request.

"Any such attempts are extremely risky and could kill your daughter. It is best to give her time and let her work it out on her own." Cameron offered her standard cautious approach.

Mrs. Harris was small in frame, but strong in resolve. She knew how to speak her mind, much like the young doctor she was addressing. "You know as well as I do that chances are slim she will come out of this on her own. I have read on the internet all sorts of stories about research happening in other countries for people with brain injuries. They aren't as blinded by quality of life arguments. Those countries believe all life is worth fighting for no matter what the costs."

"Granted I'm not very familiar with those studies, but I know that experimental studies in general are usually met with limited success." Cameron really wanted to prevent Mrs. Harris from building unrealistic expectations.

"Limited success is better than no success. All I'm asking is that you try. I'm not looking for guarantees."

Cameron didn't want to get ahead of herself just yet. "We will look into all options when action is needed. For right now, we just need to give her a bit more time to heal."

Mrs. Harris agreed for the time being. "Okay, you are right, one thing at a time."

Cameron nodded pleased with the mother's sense of rationality. As she turned to leave though, Mrs. Harris jumped in with one more comment.

"Actually, I do have one other question. I mean no offense, but I need to know. Do you believe in God?"

Cameron surprisingly wasn't too thrown by the question. "I don't think my beliefs are relevant to your daughter's care."

"You are right, they are not relevant to my daughter's care. They are relevant to me. When I have to make a decision that will affect the rest of my daughter's life and well being, I need to know if you are presenting choices with God in your heart. It offers me perspective."

"Mrs. Harris…"

"Please, don't worry, I trust you completely as a doctor. God gave you some extraordinary skills whether you choose to believe that or not. I just need to know the bias."

"I am not certain that God exists," Cameron honestly confessed.

"I had a feeling that was the case. It was the way you looked at us while we prayed. You showed contempt and a feeling that we were wasting our time. I have seen that in a lot of non-believers before. Again, this is no offense, but I would like to speak with another doctor that understands the role of faith and God in decisions of life or death. Is there a doctor in your department that sees the power of God in everyday life?"

Cameron was reluctant to offer such information. Initially she hesitated in her reply, but eventually realized she couldn't give this woman what she needed. "Yes, I will have to talk with him though. He is the primary attending assigned to the case and has had many priorities lately. Did you hear about the doctor that was shot here in the hospital?"

"Yes,"

"That was our head of diagnostics. Dr. Chase has had to fill in for his duties and has been playing a limited role in your case. He comes from a devout religious background though and would be able to address your concerns."

"Devout huh? Catholic or Protestant?" Mrs. Harris showed a very keen interest.

"Catholic," replied Cameron.

The woman smiled. "Good, I'm glad to hear that. He has the fear of God in him and knows hell is real. I would like to meet with him when he has time."

"I'll see what I can arrange. In the meantime, don't worry, we will give your daughter everything she needs."

"I have no doubt in your commitment. Thank you." Mrs. Harris went back to the group for more prayer.

-----------------------------

"The lymph node biopsy showed he has an infection, but so far we are unable to identify the organism. I'm running a few more tests. We will know in another day if there is any cancer." Foreman told Chase as he entered the ICU.

"So Harpo is still a patient? I knew something was seriously wrong with him." House blurted out. Foreman didn't notice he was awake. "Is his fever still high?"

Before Foreman even had a chance to answer, his pager went off. He looked at Chase. "You better come with me, we have trouble." Chase shot up quickly and followed Foreman.

"Good, I thought he would never leave." House got up very tenderly and started leafing through the patient files that Chase left behind. "Glad to see that I haven't missed anything," he muttered as he reviewed one boring clinic case after another. Then a big one caught his eye. "11 year old, coma, gun shot wound, infectious symptoms. Assigned to Cameron? Has Cuddy lost her mind? There are possibilities here though…"

House then heard someone coming and quickly jumped back into bed, uttering sounds of pain in the process. Cuddy entered surprised that he was all alone. "Where's Chase?"

"He and Foreman had an emergency, and I don't need a babysitter."

"You have been having hallucinations for two days. We needed to make sure you wouldn't do anything harmful, at least to other people."

"Why are you wearing big bunny ears and a cute fuzzy tail?" House stared at Cuddy with a puzzled look.

Cuddy reacted with a big gasp.

"It's a joke! I don't remember any hallucinations, so that's something. So why did you decide on the ketamine? I know I asked for it, but you were so against it a few weeks ago."

"Chase told you." Cuddy wasn't pleased, but then again she wasn't all that surprised.

"You know how easy it is for me to get the truth out of him. I could tell something was different the second I came to."

"It was a quick decision and I decided the risk was worth it. How is your pain?"

"Since you obviously found out about the morphine because you didn't give me any, my neck and side are killing me. The leg feels slightly better, but maybe that is because the pain is distributed elsewhere."

"That is to be expected, plus it is too soon to notice the full results. We'll keep any eye on it."

"So what do I do about the pain in the meantime?" House was never tolerant when it came to pain.

"Live with it," Cuddy barked with a tough love attitude. "I have marked your chart with a huge morphine allergy warning, so acetaminophen and fentanyl is all you get. You better enjoy the pain while you have it. It gives you both a chance to catch up on old times."

"I need a laptop, and internet access. I need something to do while sitting here going out of my mind."

"I'll allow that." Cuddy was skeptical but did not find any reason to deny the request. "I'm blocking all the porn sites though. I don't want this hospital to get in any type of trouble."

"Will I have access to myspace?"

"Yes, I suppose that is okay as long as I set the parental controls."

"Then I'm fine. I have over a thousand friends online."

"Right, I'm sure you do. I'll have to get you a loaner since yours is still in a cordoned off room. I'll amuse you for now."

-----------------------------------------

Chase and Foreman gathered in the hall after performing an emergency tracheotomy.

Foreman felt aggravation over the way this case was going. "This is not making any sense, I know that he has some type of infection, but what in the world would cause the tongue to swell so bad that it cuts off the airway? We have tried the normal round of antibiotics. I'm going to start a more aggressive round next."

Chase agreed that something wasn't right about it. "We need to consult. We must be missing the obvious. Get Cameron and we'll meet in a half hour. I'm sure she has some issues to bring up with her case as well."

Just then Chase's pager went off. "Never mind. It looks like I need to help Cameron now. I'll see what she needs and get you when we are ready."

Chase rushed downstairs to join Cameron. The sound of alarms screeching was all he could hear as he got closer. "She's not breathing!" Cameron shouted.

Chase rushed over to check the pulse ox. "She didn't respond to the oxygen you gave her?" He noticed the oxygen mask on the patient.

"Yes, for a few seconds then she just stopped breathing." Cameron replied.

"Her brain injury wouldn't be causing this. Okay, we need to intubate." He grabbed the needed instruments and started the procedure.

"Careful of the ICP Monitor." Cameron pointed to the probe still inserted in the patient's skull.

Chase had a tougher time than usual inserting the tube because he had to be careful of the way he moved the head. "Its not going in. I'm going to have to tilt the head and try again."

"That could aggravate her brain injury." Cameron was very worried about the risks and had a look of panic in her eyes.

"She isn't breathing. I have no choice." Chase tilted the patient's head upward and inserted the tube. Cameron quickly hooked her up to the respirator. After a few seconds, the breath sounds went back to normal.

Chase and Cameron both shared a sigh of relief. They removed their gloves and stepped out of the room to start a private discussion. "Heart contractions appear normal so this didn't come from the brain stem," Chase commented.

"I'll get a chest x-ray. This could be another infection."

"Once you get the results, meet Foreman and I in the new lounge. We will be discussing his case too. Two codes in 15 minutes. When it rains, it pours."

"Dr. Chase?" came from a voice that echoed behind him. He turned around. "I'm Melanie Harris, Emily's mom. Has Dr. Cameron talked with you?"

"Not yet." He looked at Cameron suspiciously.

"I need to meet with you sometime. Dr. Cameron suggested you might be able to offer some answers to specific questions we have."

Chase suspected that the "specific" questions were related to religion. Cameron gave him an "I'm sorry" glance in the background.

"Sure, I'll have some time later this afternoon. In the meantime, we need to figure out what caused your daughter to stop breathing."

"Thank you doctor. I appreciate any time you might have. This is very important."

Chase headed upstairs wondering what else can happen next. He quickly wiped away that thought. There was always potential for worse. Too late. His pager again began to generate its usual shrieking noise. This time it was from Cuddy. He grabbed his head realizing that he wasn't getting any mercy.


	5. Chapter 5

"Yes, I know I left him alone… I had two emergencies…Cameron and Foreman really need my help here…Yes, they are both critical…Okay, as soon as I'm done. Thanks."

"House always ignores Cuddy's pages." Foreman observed with amusement. "I think he likes her verbal abuse in person. He secretly loves dominant women."

"Yeah, well I'm not in the position to ignore my boss' boss. I'm not that far up the food chain yet." Chase knew it was wise not to ruffle any feathers.

Foreman continued his enjoyment. "You are too much of a people pleaser that likes to avoid conflict. House seeks conflict out as if it were a sweet chocolate dessert. To him, it is better than sex."

"Yeah, I'll keep that in mind." Chase didn't want to think about his boss' sick habits anymore and changed the subject. "Anyway, I see you have some ideas for your patient." He noticed the new scribbles on the white board.

"Shouldn't we wait for Cameron? She would have some wonderful immunology insights."

"She is doing a chest x-ray on her patient and will be along soon."

Foreman started reading the possibilities, although they were remote. "Lymphadenitis, cat-scratch disease, sarcoidosis, herpes…"

"Candidiasis?" Chase figured anything was on the table at this point.

"The culture of the tongue didn't come up with any yeast bacterias. We must be overlooking the obvious." Foreman recognized the futility of their exercise and went back to the symptoms on the board. "Flu symptoms, swollen and white spotted tongue, swollen lymph nodes."

"You are overlooking the most obvious thing." Cameron arrived with her x-rays in tow. "Have you done an HIV test?"

Chase and Foreman looked at each other completely flabbergasted. How could they miss something so obvious?

Cameron understood why it wasn't covered before. "Many people don't want to consider that as a cause. House didn't want to consider it because it was too boring."

Foreman was pleased that at least one of them was able to come up with something. "His personal history didn't give us a reason to suspect that, but it does make sense. I'll run the test." He noticed the x-ray in Cameron's hand. "I see you brought us a picture to look at."

"Pulmonary edema caused by acute respiratory distress syndrome." Cameron put the x-ray up on the board for all to see.

"That's a side-effect of the neutropenia." Chase observed accepting the most obvious reason.

"That is the likely cause," added Foreman, "but it could also be related to a subarachnoid hemorrhage somewhere in the brain. She is very prone to that as well. I suggest an LP to rule that out."

Chase wanted to be sure they weren't stepping on Cameron toes. "It's your call, will the mother agree to such a procedure?"

"She will agree to anything that will help her daughter. I agree with Foreman. Only one of us can do an LP though."

All eyes focused on Chase. He offered a frustrated glance in return, one of a doctor that was going in too many directions right now. "Okay, let me know when. I'm sure I can squeeze it in between everything else."

Since Chase was feeling some frustration, he decided it was the best time to bring up something else with Cameron. "So what is up with the mother that I need to talk to her about?"

Cameron lowered her head feeling ashamed. "Uh, she doesn't have confidence in my abilities to offer proper choices based on faith. She wanted to run the concerns by someone who would understand her questions."

"So, you just happened to mention my religious background?" Chase was rather annoyed. "You have a far greater moral ground than I do. You couldn't convince her that your choices would be completely ethical?"

"I thought I was doing well until the believing in God question came up. She didn't like the fact that I didn't. All she needs is a little scripture thrown her way and she will be fine."

"What was wrong with Foreman? He grew up in a family that went to church every week."

"He didn't attend the seminary. You are better with all those spiritual notions when it comes to death and dying." Cameron knew what she said was inappropriate, but she didn't know how else to put it. This was not her area of expertise.

Chase couldn't believe what he was hearing. Sure, Cameron was spiritually ignorant, but this time she went too far. "Spiritual notions? It's never that easy. She will likely be asking the very tough questions that can hamper the objectivity that a doctor is supposed to bring. Too many medical professionals are being asked these days by patient's families to perform actions that are in conflict with fundamental healing traditions in exchange for Christian conscience. None of us should be asked to do that, especially those of us that have a Christian background."

"I'm not enough of an expert in that area to convince her otherwise." Cameron argued. "You just need to talk with her. Convince her our intentions are true."

Chase took a moment to quietly stir his objections amongst himself and eventually relented. "I'll see what I can do. Is there anything else?"

Cameron dropped her head, thus acknowledging there was one other issue. Chase raised his eyebrows, eagerly waiting to hear what possibly could be next.

"She wants us to find a way to get her daughter out of the coma." Cameron announced shyly.

"What did you tell her?" Chase and Foreman were now at full attention, curious to hear the answer.

"I told her we would treat the infections first and then would consider those options if she is still in the coma by that time."

Chase was actually impressed by that answer. "Good stall tactic. House would have been mad at hell at you, but given the recent circumstances, we need to buy some time."

"There are several studies regarding methods in waking patients from comas," an intrigued Foreman noted, "but I'm not sure if any apply to her type of injury. I'll have to do some research."

"You'll find a lot of therapeutic nihilism." Chase knew a bit about the controversies of the subject.

Cameron and Foreman both shared puzzled looks.

"It all came about with Karen Ann Quinlan. Her brain injuries were beyond hope and her feeding tube was removed. Many health professionals believe this has led doctors to abandon severely brain-injured patients too quickly, therefore statistics show that these patients aren't getting better. Families and doctors both now give up believing there is no hope, a phenomenon labeled therapeutic nihilism. The argument is that these patients deserve better therapeutic engagement but they aren't getting it."

"Do you possibly want to offer that kind of hope? That kind of thinking misleads people into believing their loved ones will be back to normal someday." Cameron was always outraged by physicians using research as false hope. It drove her crazy whenever House tried it.

"If the proper expectations are set, there should be no controversy," countered Chase. "Anyway, we can address that later. Let's deal with what we must now. I've got to get back to the ICU. Page me if you need me. Please try to avoid House for right now."

Cameron again followed Chase into the hallway. "I'm really sorry Chase. She had me backed into a corner. You know how this God stuff freaks me out."

"You forget it freaks me out too. Just because I'm well educated in doctrine doesn't mean I can share in their faith and beliefs. That makes me irresponsible."

"I'm not asking you to share. Just show a little empathy, that's all."

"I have a feeling she will want more than empathy. I'll see what happens." He abruptly ended the conversation by walking away.

"Thank you!" Cameron shouted using a smoothed over approach.

-------------------

House saw his best buddy drag himself into the ICU much like a drunk that was coming off an all-night bender. "You look terrible."

"Thank you for noticing." Wilson sat down in his usual uncomfortable chair by the bed.

"Let me guess. You have been holding vigil by my bedside the last few days while trying to do your job."

"Yep, I'm a sick bastard, aren't I? You're welcome by the way." Wilson noticed House busily tapping away at the portable computer in front of him. "Why do you have a laptop?"

"Cuddy let me have one. I knew she was sweet on me."

"Not how, why? Let me guess, you told her your lie about myspace."

"Research for Cameron's case."

"Cameron asked you to do this?" Wilson asked skeptically. He knew better.

"Nope, she has no idea I even know about this."

"Can't Cameron, or anyone on your team, do their own research?"

"Cuddy is in charge of them right now. I'm sure she is working them to death. They will be down here in no time begging me to come back so the department will go back to its slow pace." House never stopped his searching while talking to Wilson.

"I suppose it is foolish of me to warn you to not get on Cuddy or Cameron's bad side. You'll wish those bullets did their ultimate job."

"Thank God I have a wimp like Chase to run interference. I'll blame him."

"Gee, everyone will be so glad you are better. It must be your warm and fuzzy personality. I'm going to read my paper and ignore you now." Wilson snapped open his paper and leaned himself back in the chair.

House said nothing, too engrossed with his online search. No more time for banter with Wilson right now.

----------------------------

"Mrs. Harris?" Chase asked as he entered the private room where the meeting was arranged.

"Dr. Chase, thank you for taking time to speak with me. I don't like to waste time, so I will get right to the point. I like Dr. Cameron very much, but she is an agnostic. I'm not sure if she will understand our wishes when hard decisions must be made."

"I'm probably not the best person to talk to about this. I may have been raised Catholic, but I haven't been practicing for a while. I also don't like to consider Christian values in making medical decisions."

"So, you have been questioning God?" she asked.

Chase was confused by her observation, but decided to play along. "Yes."

"That's good. God loves it when we question. It means we are willing to grow. What is your specialty?"

"I'm an intensivist."

"A fascinating choice. You care for critically ill patients on a daily basis, don't you? Amidst all the suffering and uncertainty, it's is your job to make people as comfortable as possible and when necessary perform life saving procedures. At least 30 percent die, don't they?"

Chase nodded, still very uncertain what this woman wanted from him.

"I can tell that despite all that pain, you love your job. Deep down you believe you were meant to do this and are making a difference."

"Mrs. Harris, if you are worried that we won't do everything for your daughter..."

"I saw you with Emily earlier. I'm not looking for Christian rights when treating my daughter. If anything, I want the opposite. I want heroic measures, consequences be damned. When a physician presents me with the life or death decisions, I want to know that he or she is concerned with both the physical and spiritual well being of my child. Too many doctors only care about the physical and do not personalize. I have a hunch you do your best to hide it, but you do personalize. You do care."

"Being too personal is a sure sign of burnout in this profession."

"No one can do your intense job without God in their heart, or that person would either be so overwhelmed by sadness they couldn't function or would get kicked out for not helping people. I saw how urgent it was to you to save Emily's life. That action deeply mattered because she was a real person to you. The other doctors don't act that way. That is the full faith of God working through you and I think you know that.

"You are wrong. God has turned his back on me." Chase wasn't sure why he was divulging such information, but he hoped it would deter her.

Mrs. Harris bowed her head and started praying. "_My good angel, you come from heaven; God has sent you to take care of me. Shelter me in this present night; enfold me under your wings; lighten my heavy task; direct my steps_._" _She deliberately stopped there and looked up at a very stunned Chase.

"_Do not leave me, be near me, defend me against the spirit of evil. But above all, come to my aid in the last struggle of my life. Deliver my soul so that with you it may praise, love and contemplate the goodness of God forever and ever. Amen_._"_ Chase could never forget the words to the prayer that offered him so much comfort during the rough moments growing up.

Mrs. Harris smiled and tears welled up in her eyes when Chase finished the prayer.

"I haven't recited that prayer in years," Chase reflected with sadness. "How did you know…"

"Now I know that God sent us the right person. When the time comes, you know that the angels are there to protect Emily. That's what makes you fearless in the times of crisis. If you tell me it is time to stop fighting, then I know you are speaking with mercy. If you tell me that something will give her another shot at life, albeit a diminished one, I know that you present that option with faith."

"You are asking me to lose my objectivity as a doctor. My faith isn't as strong as you hope. That isn't fair to you or your daughter."

"You will never let anything bad happen to her, so that is objective enough for me. Don't worry, you have not been forgotten. Let go of the fear. I don't care if you say your prayers everyday, go to church every week, or live morally or amorally. That is not faith. It comes from the inside and your soul is abundant. You will not let us down. God bless you Dr. Chase."

Chase stood completely bewildered as she left the room. _What just happened here?_ If he didn't know better, Mrs. Harris was trying to save his soul.

----------

Cameron found a very pensive Chase in the doctor's lounge. He was a million miles away in thought and didn't notice her.

"So, how did it go?" Cameron asked very cautiously.

"Fine." Chase was unconvincing.

"Judging by your reflective mood, I would say it didn't go fine."

"It's cool now. We had our talk and now we have an understanding."

"Then why are you so freaked out? I'm thinking the understanding is less than settling."

"I can't talk about it right now." Chase wanted to be evasive. "Did you tell her that I was in the seminary once?"

"No, I didn't mention that. She said something that bothered you, didn't she?"

Chase sat silently and would neither confirm nor deny her question.

Cameron leaned over and her eyes met his. "Chase, are you okay?"

"It's nothing, just let it go."

Cameron was concerned, but knew it was never a good idea to push. "Okay, I'll back off. Do you know where Foreman is?"

"He left already. I think he was getting together with his lady friend."

"Doesn't that seem so cute? I wonder where he found time to meet someone."

"He had a brush with death and some time off. That would inspire me to make some calls." Chase did not want to engage in small talk. Cameron was becoming more of an agitation by the minute.

"I don't think Foreman has anywhere near as many phone numbers as you do," Cameron teased. "I'm surprised you haven't been making calls lately."

"What makes you think I haven't?"

That was the rise that Cameron was hoping for. "Chase, ever since you became an attending you have been a humorless wreck. You have not been making calls."

"Yeah, well, I've had a lot on my mind."

"We all have, but that isn't stopping Foreman."

"Since when have you been concerned with my well being?" Chase now used a defensive tone. "Are you actually feeling guilty for setting me up? Maybe you should be taking your own advice."

Cameron flashed Chase a 'get real' look. He knew what happened the last time she made a call. "You and I have been through more than two people should have to put up with lately. We need a small break. I am accepting your offer for a drink now."

Chase rolled his eyes backward, very unsure as to why Cameron was doing this to him now. He responded to her invitation in a very tired voice. "I'm not in the mood right now."

"Come on, one beer. It will be two colleagues having a drink after work. We can complain about people. It will be fun."

"Sorry." He got up acting very uptight, grabbed his bag briskly and left, leaving Cameron behind rather surprised. That was the first time she heard Chase say no to a social invitation. Something was deeply bothering him.

**A/N: Did I make Cameron enough of a weak manipulative bitch? That was the intention, but if I was too subtle or not subtle enough, let me know. I really want to show her ignorance on cases where there are no fine lines. Also, I will take suggestions on who Chase should call eventually (I'll consider anyone, even Cameron, but be warned, I don't do slash). The poor boy needs relief! Thanks for reading!**


	6. Chapter 6

"Good morning Natalie." Chase tried to flash a convincing smile, but his attempts at any cheer were flat. His restless mind made for a long evening with little rest and recovery time.

"I hope you don't mind if I mention you look like crap. Another wild night?" Natalie scorned.

"No, I just didn't sleep well. You didn't page me just to check up on me, did you?" Chase posed the question with a flirtatious grin.

"Dr. House made me page you. Drs. Cameron and Foreman are already in there."

"I wonder what he needs all three of us for? I guess I better go find out. Want to come along for fun?"

"Yeah, right. You know how they say doctors make the worst patients? Dr. House is beyond worst. A smart person wouldn't be such an asshole around so many people that have access to drugs that could kill him."

"Welcome to my daily life. Thanks Natalie."

Chase walked in to see House, Cameron and Foreman all less than patiently waiting.

"Too busy flirting with that pretty nurse to join us serious doctors trying to work? You look like hell, so give the banging nurses a rest for once."

Foreman wasn't in the mood for House's insults this morning, even if they weren't geared at him. "Get on with it, House. Some of us have jobs to do."

"Very well." House turned his laptop around on the tray table. "This is the answer to all your questions."

"It's in Japanese," Cameron observed with great irritation.

"What, none of you speak Japanese? I thought you all were smart."

Chase looked at the screen. "Research studies for the brain injured. The rest is a bit too technical for me."

Cameron and Foreman looked at him rather surprised. Chase was getting rather tired of defending his actions. "Japanese is a language taught in Australian schools. I also got to visit there a few times. I know just as much as your high school French."

"What do brain studies have to do with anything? I assume you have a point for all this." Foreman still wanted the answers he was looking for.

House was enjoying irritating his temperamental neurologist through suspense, but decided it was time to press on. "Electronic brain stimulation. Studies have been done all over the world, including very small studies in the US. None have been more aggressive and more promising though than the research in Japan."

"This is about my patient, isn't it? How did you find out?" Cameron tried to be confrontational, but was quickly shot down by glances from Foreman and Chase. "Never mind, I should have known you would find a way to stick your nose in our business."

"Come, take a look. The writing might be in Japanese, but there are plenty of pretty pictures. The diagrams make it easy for even Chase here to understand."

Chase was too disoriented for witty comebacks with House this morning, so he chose not to acknowledge the usual insults. They all gathered around the screen to examine the diagrams.

House was ready to spout off all the knowledge he attained in his fruitful search. "Time to show my awesomeness. In the US studies, doctors attach a cuff to the wrist and send a 20-milliamp charge through the median nerve which sends the signals through the cerebral cortex. Those studies are performed by one doctor in Philadelphia. The Japanese are far more aggressive. They implant the electrodes right into the spine. The success rate is not anywhere near as high with the arm cuff as opposed to the implants. Of course part of that reason could be that the US study is having great trouble finding people to participate. This country is way too sensitive to the whole quality of life thing. The Japanese aren't as picky."

Cameron skeptically processed House's knowledge transfer. "Why would we consider either of these options? We could end up waking a vegetable. She could do that on her own."

"The mother wants it." Chase answered in a quiet voice.

"Cameron, you aren't seeing the greater good that can come from this. These researchers are chomping at the bit for willing subjects with brain injuries. This patient could end up doing a lot of good for many people someday. Young brains make for outstanding case studies and could provide years of valuable data."

"This isn't a lab rat, House. We need to show some human responsibility here." Cameron was livid that yet again House was missing the human element of the analysis.

Foreman, after having some time to mull over the idea, saw the viability. "I could see why this would work. This type of stimulation is used for muscle control in quadriplegics. The idea is that the electricity makes it to the brain, crossing the opposite hemisphere, and stimulating the arousal centers. Instead of stimulating the muscles, you are working straight through the primary nervous system. It actually sounds very reasonable. Planting electrodes in the spine seems rather extreme though. I would imagine that should only happen for those that have spent a long time in persistent vegetative states."

"I need facts. What are the benefits? The best case scenario, what is it?"

House frowned. He knew Cameron wasn't going to like the most hopeful result. "The best case was a woman who was declared brain-dead. She was taken off the respirator and started breathing on her own. Her mother deemed this to be a miracle since the doctors told her it wouldn't happen, so she agreed to the cuff stimulation for her daughter. The treatment woke her up."

"Sounds great, so now her daughter is living independently and holding down a good job, right?" Cameron knew House was leaving out the most important part.

"She still suffers from lack of impulse control, short-term memory impairment, slurred speech, but she can walk and function somewhat. She requires constant care from her mother."

Cameron took that response to be argument enough that this risky option should not be considered.

House wasn't done yet. He wasn't going to take Cameron's stuffiness as a sign of defeat. He never did before. "Most of the cases push someone from a persistent vegetative state into a minimally conscious state. This patient would be considered at worst minimally conscious right now. Who knows what function she could recover? These researchers would kill to have a young 11 year old brain that is not PVS in their study."

"I'm not willing to tell this poor mother to let these people play Frankenstein with her daughter. Because she is so young maybe it is not worth prolonging what could easily be a very long unproductive life."

"It isn't your call!" Chase shouted. The others expressed deep surprise over him abruptly joining the conversation after staying quiet. "It is your job to present options and the risks. You wouldn't be giving false hope. This mother is rather wise."

Cameron frowned knowing that her objections were not considering all the options Mrs. Harris wanted to hear. She didn't care though, since Mrs. Harris was so damn wrong. She continued her devil's advocate mindset. "What in the world does electronic stimulation do to someone with a bullet in their brain? Wouldn't that act as some type of lightening rod?"

House as usual was prepared for any type of resistance. "I don't think anyone knows what it would do. We need to get the bullet out anyway."

Now it was Foreman's turn to raise objections. "House, as a doctor, I don't think I'll need to tell you the risks involved with killing her by digging into brain tissue to remove the object."

"The part of the brain it is in will likely result in the bullet shifting. It is in a rather soft area. That sinking could kill her or greatly impair her anyway, unless you don't want her moving the rest of her life. What did the MRI show?"

"Considering the bullet didn't have enough metallic composition to upset the MRI, yes, the risk of it breaking apart in her brain was evaluated. The bullet didn't look like it was intact. The possibility that the bullet would break apart was listed when the VP shunt was inserted for the hydrocephalus."

"So how do you get the fragments out?" Cameron was waiting to hear the next big and reckless House plan.

"One dangerous plan at a time please. Take it easy on me, I'm in the ICU. My brain isn't exactly operating on full capacity. That is what my crack team of doctors is for anyway. There must be plenty of bullet-in-brain cases out there that outline some new breakthrough procedure. I think."

"I've heard enough." Foreman was ready to get on with his day now that he did his part in humoring his boss. "I have a patient with a real condition that needs to be treated."

Cameron decided to join Foreman's lead. "Yes, me too." All three turned away and started to exit the ICU.

"Chase," House motioned to him as the others were leaving. Chase walked back over to the bed and tried to speak, but was hushed by House as he waited patiently for the others to get out of sight. As soon as there were no signs of their presence, he started talking.

"Two things. First, get Cameron off this case. If she has her way, the patient will be a full-fledged home decoration by the time she is twelve."

"That's not my call. Cuddy put her on it. If it was my call, I'd still let her keep the case."

"No you wouldn't. All I'd have to do is insult you a little and you would yank that thing away from her faster than a child with a sharp knife. You masochists are so predictable."

"Yeah, well lucky for me, that isn't the case. You said two things."

House's expression turned to one of a bit more humility. "I want you to do my vitals check this morning. I'm not feeling great. I think I have a fever."

Chase's face instantly showed deep concern. He grabbed his stethoscope and listened to the chest. "Something isn't right. Heartbeat is a little fast. I'll have to do a full exam."

House nodded in reluctant agreement. "This stays between you and me for now. Tell Cuddy only if you find something."

"Okay, deal." Chase said as he began the examination.

------------

Foreman had the test results in hand and needed to consult the resident immunological expert to verify his proposed course of treatment. He finally managed to find Cameron in the lab analyzing blood samples for her patient.

"There you are. I have been looking for you. I have the test results back." Foreman handed her the sheet of paper.

"So, he's HIV positive. You going to start him on anti-retrovirals?"

"Yes, although I was hoping you could recommend the doses since he will also be on the antibiotics. Hopefully the combination of the two will get rid of the infection."

"Sure, I'll write down a course of treatment. When are you going to tell him?"

"I was going to wait until his tongue was at least back to normal so he could ask questions."

"Good idea. I'll work on this as soon as I'm done here. It shouldn't be too long."

Foreman noticed that Cameron was finishing a blood test. "Have you found anything out?"

"She is responding well to the antibiotics for the infection in her lungs. I just can't figure out what caused it. Chase is doing the LP later this morning. Anyway, come back in a half hour and I'll have those recommended doses for you."

Foreman nodded and turned to leave. "Foreman, can I ask you a question?" He knew what that meant. Cameron was having yet another personal crisis that she had to resolve now.

"Sure," Foreman replied in a helpful tone, but really he was slightly upset that he didn't escape in time.

"Do you think I did a really rotten thing to Chase?" Cameron showed some extreme guilt in phrasing the question.

"I think you put him in a really awful position. Yeah, I would say you hung him out to dry."

"What would you have done?"

"Send the mother to Cuddy if she got too insistent. Don't send anyone to a fellow doctor based solely on his religious beliefs. You could have at least consulted Chase on her questions and dealt with her yourself. You can't run from tough situations because they make you uncomfortable. Of course Chase was also a fool for agreeing to speak to the woman. He needs to learn to say no."

"I don't think the conversation went well. He was pretty freaked out afterward."

"What did he say?" Foreman was surprised that Chase would actually reveal any details.

"Nothing. As usual, he wouldn't talk to me."

"I have never known Chase to hold grudges. Just give it a few days to blow over. In the meantime, you need to deal with your patient's family and only you. Also, apologize to Chase."

"I tried. He didn't want to hear it."

"That is because you tried to apologize as the helpless victim whose mess he had to clean up. Show some responsibility and then apologize. He might be open to it then."

Cameron held her head down knowing Foreman was right. She didn't like hearing it, but he was right.

"Anyway, I need those doses ASAP. I'll be back in a half hour."

"They'll be ready," Cameron assured. Foreman was correct that she needed to get back to her job. She would worry about the rest later.

**a/n: This brain stimulation stuff is for real! I read all about it in a recent article. Sounded like a great medical mystery to play out here, especially with all the religious themes. Chapter 7 is in editing mode and should be out soon. Thanks for reading!**


	7. Chapter 7

**a/n: _Another attempt at the author's note, since the last one was punched up quickly amidst mass confusion in my home and turned out to read rather absurd (Thanks Queen of Blank!). I don't expect people to compare this chapter with the unpublished one that I never shared. :)_**

**I know I promised this new update rather quickly, but once I started to edit the chapter I realized how much it sucked. What you have here is a brand new rewrite. Since I spent all week bouncing around trying to figure how to make this one work, just let me know if you think it's great, it's okay or it sucks. I can handle comments either way! Thanks for taking time to read this.**

Chase brushed into Cuddy's office without knocking. He quickly realized he had never done that before. That was a notorious House tactic. "We have an issue."

Cuddy stood behind her desk, surprised by the entrance. "Well, it must be important for you to just barge in here. What's up?"

"House has a fever of 101 and the CBC showed an elevated white blood count. His blood pressure is a little sluggish as well."

Worry flashed on Cuddy's face initially, but she realized it was too early to panic. "When did this start happening?"

"Sometime early this morning."

"How's the respiratory rate?"

"Normal so far. I started him on an antibiotic in case it's an infection."

Cuddy exhaled a sigh of relief. No reason to suspect a problem yet. She remembered the surgeon telling her how House was at a greater a risk of infection due to amount of tissue the bullet cut through in the abdomen. "Okay we will see if that works. I'll check on him this afternoon. Thanks."

Chase nodded and headed for the door. "Chase, did you notice these problems or did he tell you?"

"He told me and made it clear that he didn't want anyone else to know." Chase wasn't certain as to why the answer was relevant, but he responded anyway.

A happy smile formed on Cuddy's face as she slowly sat down in her chair.

"What is it, if you don't mind me asking?"

"You just answered a big question I have had in my mind for sometime."

Chase's confused expression warranted Cuddy to continue with a further explanation.

"I have known House since med school. Despite his wackiness, volatile behavior and completely unpredictable nature, I usually understood his motivation. I did that is until he came to me begging for an attending position. I told him this was a teaching hospital. Positions like that had to be planned well in advance and approved by the budget committee. I also told him that it couldn't get approved for his department unless revenue increased. His current caseload barely justified any of your positions, even his. I asked him why the position was so important. 'I can't lose Chase' he told me."

"So how in the world did he get it approved?"

"He tracked down every member of the budget committee and berated them into submission. It is my hunch that blackmail and bribing got involved in many cases. Anyway, he got them to consider the position effective immediately, but the proposal came at a price. Revenue would have to increase. Caseload would have to more than double and you would have to start running cases. When I attached to the proposal a plan that showed possible expansion of the department to offering top notch specialized services nationally, they went for it. Money and reputation is how you win over these people."

"Is that really the plan?" Chase's curiosity was piqued now.

"I have no idea, but it certainly opened the door to get positions secured later for Cameron and Foreman. The only problem there is, House isn't sure if he wants Cameron. He doubts her intentions. He also knows Foreman has no interest in sticking around."

"House and Cameron had a big fight a few weeks ago. She was talking about leaving."

"House wants to be sure that her head is in this before performing drastic measures to keep her. He needs to know for sure that her commitment isn't due to some lingering crush. I don't think he got his answer yet."

"So what does all this..."

"...have to do with House trusting you with his medical problems? I never once understood why he went to so much trouble to get you to stay with him. He has been through many fellows throughout the years and never went to bat for any of them. Sure, you are the first person to actually survive the full term of the fellowship with him, but that does not guarantee loyalty in his mind. Like the others, he could have easily let you go. Now I know why he did it. He trusts you with his life."

Chase never thought about it that way before. It never occurred to him what the true motivation was. He probably didn't want to drive himself crazy thinking about it.

"Don't take that lightly either," Cuddy continued. "He doesn't trust anyone like that except for me and Wilson, and I wonder about me sometimes. While I'm at it, there is something else I'm curious about. Why did you accept?"

"No good reason other than I had no reason not to. I like working for House strangely enough. He's never boring."

"Normally I would criticize you at this point for worrisome co-dependent behavior, but that would be hypocritical. I don't know why I let him do what he does, so I wouldn't expect you to explain it either. Okay, I'm done rambling. I'll let you know about House after I check on him. Thanks Chase, for everything."

Chase offered a baffled nod and went on his way. He was strangely comforted that it wasn't just him that House was making crazy.

------------------------------------------

He had a little time before the scheduled LP for Cameron's patient. This was a rare opportunity to use some time wisely. Chase sat down at the conference table, opened the laptop, and instantly started typing keywords into the medical search database. Sure, he could be working on the paperwork that was stacking almost to his eyeballs next to him, but he was still curious about the brain stimulation options that House presented. He was even more curious as to how bullet fragments could be safely removed deep within a brain. Sure all this neurology was more Foreman's area, but he had some time and Foreman didn't.

He was so lost in study that an hour passed without him noticing. _How perplexing that in an hour no one tried to page or interrupt me._ He smiled. It felt like old times.

Chase's brain was rather fried from filtering the hoards of information that revealed so little, so he got up and started walking around the room to stretch a bit. Cameron's chest x-rays were still on the board and as he walked innocently past them something caught his eye. He turned on the background light in ultimate curiosity to get a better look. "No way." He saw the foreign object. That couldn't be what he thought it was. Or could it?

Chase quickly went back to the laptop and typed in another set of keywords. The first case study that came up was a 100 match. As he read through the details, he suddenly realized he had struck gold. _That would explain everything! _They needed a better look. The chest was only one part of the puzzle. He whipped out his pager to summon Cameron and Foreman. _MRI room, Emily Harris, ASAP._

----------------------

Foreman had no idea what was so urgent that his presence was needed in the MRI control room now, but he hurried anyway. Chase was usually never one to push the panic button. He found Chase and Cameron in the control room, patient positioned and the scan ready to start.

"Watch this," Chase told Foreman with a fascinated smile as he started the brain scan.

As the silhouette of the brain started to load, Foreman and Cameron's jaws both dropped in disbelief. "Where's the bullet?" Cameron wondered.

"It's there." Foreman's eyes stayed completely fixed on the scan. "It just isn't in one piece anymore. There are fragments everywhere, but not as many as I would think."

"Now see this," Chase said still believing he was witnessing one of the rarest medical phenomenons he had ever seen. He hit the keys prompting another scan.

"Whoa," was the collective sound by all three. "Her lungs have pieces all over the place. I'm surprised the fragments haven't shredded the lung tissue," Cameron observed.

"The fragments are small and soft," Foreman countered. "Their presence is enough to cause an infection, but not damage. They must have gotten into the veins first and settled in the lungs which was what caused the neutropenia and the lung infection."

"She hasn't had any heart difficulties, but we might want to check that to be safe." Chase typed in the command for the heart scan next.

"See, right ventricle," Chase pointed out. "Nothing catastrophic, but it proves she might have fragments everywhere. Since her shunt drains to the abdomen, I'd suspect that is where the source is." Chase scanned the abdomen next.

The ducklings all observed the minefield that now existed in the abdomen. "Now this part makes sense." Foreman said as he looked at the multitude of dots on the screen.

"How did the fragments not shred the soft tubing of the shunt?" Cameron was amazed how much debris could be circulated and not cause any damage. "How did you figure out this was happening?" She asked Chase in amazement.

"I looked at your chest x-ray and did some research. Similar cases have happened before, but this is extremely rare."

Cameron's eyes were wide open in astonishment. "I think nature just solved our bullet problem."

"This was an act of God." Chase muttered under his breath. Cameron frowned at Chase's observation. Foreman smiled in agreement.

"I'm going to tell the mother what happened." Cameron went to leave, but Chase stopped her. "You need to get approval for surgery. I'm going to finish a full body scan and then get a surgical team together. If anything, her abdomen must be cleared out now."

Cameron left as Chase and Foreman finished up the MRI. "Get a few more scans of the brain while you are at it," Foreman suggested. "I need to make sure the remaining fragments won't be at risk for causing damage from shifting."

------------------------

"Where there is life, there is hope." Mrs. Harris recited as she and Cameron watched the surgery in the observation room. "You really don't believe that, do you?"

"Mrs. Harris, my beliefs are not relevant here. It is not wise as a doctor to deliver false hope. Things more times than not turn out against the way we had planned."

"Something happened to you to make you lose hope. Maybe it was your job. I know you see death and suffering every day. Somehow though, I sense it was more personal. You don't need to tell me. You just have to understand, with me, there is no such thing as false hope."

"Everything will be fine with your daughter," Cameron assured.

"You say that as though you are trying to convince yourself. Don't worry I won't sue. Have you checked into those other options I asked about?"

"Any other option is incredibly risky. I have too much respect for life to put a comatose patient in such unnecessary jeopardy. She could die."

Mrs. Harris vehemently disagreed. "Respecting life means fighting for it at all costs. There is no room for hurt feelings or lost expectations. Dealing with the consequences is something I do with God by my side. Why in the world would God give doctors like you such amazing gifts and not have you use them to the fullest? I want to know all the options."

Cameron looked into Mrs. Harris' determined eyes again and remembered that it wasn't her call. "We are looking into experimental brain stimulation treatments. Studies have been done in Japan and on a smaller scale here in the US. There are too many other factors that have to be addressed before we get to that. We are still researching the feasibility."

"I'll give you time to make to research, but I'm telling you to make it feasible. I have nothing to lose here."

"Nothing except your daughter."

"If she is comatose the rest of her life, I have lost her. Even unresponsive but awake is something I can work with."

"Okay, while she is recovering from the surgery I will gather the best options and present them to you."

"Thank you Dr. Cameron for respecting my wishes." They turned back to observe the rest of the surgery in silence.

-------------------------------------------------

Foreman found Chase later in the day in the clinic lobby. "I'm heading out. I'm on my way to Philadelphia to visit with the brain stimulation specialist tomorrow."

"Thanks for making the trip on short notice. Once Cameron spoke to the mother, now we have no choice. Better sooner than later."

"No problem. It should be educational."

"I think you were willing to go so you could stay with your girlfriend," Chase said with a fiendish smile.

"I need to make the trip worthwhile." Foreman grinned in return. "I'll see you the day after tomorrow."

"See ya."

The familiar sounds of alert started chiming from Chase's pager. "You better get that," Foreman said still sporting a smile as he headed for the door. "Sounds important."

"Thanks." Chase replied with a sarcastic tone. The sarcasm quickly turned to unease as he read the message. He started running toward the ICU.

Cuddy and the crash team worked frantically on House as Chase entered. "He's in respiratory distress," Cuddy shouted. "I've started an albuterol inhalation. Check the abdomen. I suspect internal bleeding."

Chase peeled back the gauze that was covering the wound and started feeling the area. "I need to drain the peritoneum." The nurse handed him a huge needle that he quickly sunk into House's side. Instead of the expected blood, the drainage was cloudy and yellow.

"It isn't bleeding. It's worse. There's fluid and bacteria. He's got peritonitis."

Cuddy's face turned white. "Oh God, the gastrointestinal tract is probably ruptured. We have to get him to surgery now. Get over here and get his breathing stabilized. I'll call the OR."

"Stop the IV," Chase shouted to the nurse as he took Cuddy's place. "The extra fluid in the GI could kill him."

Chase started examining the pulse/ox on the monitor as House continued to breathe in the inhalant. He felt slight relief when the numbers started to improve. "Give him another dose. It needs to be perfect for surgery." Chase turned to a barely conscious House. "House, we are taking you to surgery. Do you understand?"

Trembling and still struggling for breath, House nodded weakly in response. With his shaking hand he grabbed Chase's arm, hoping to say something, but was unable to speak.

"It's under control. Just get better." Chase tried to be reassuring but his words came with a touch of fear.

The surgical transport team swept into the room and whisked House away in a flash. Chase and Cuddy instinctively joined the pack and followed behind in silence. As they arrived at the doors to the OR, Chase and Cuddy stopped in their tracks and watched the rest of entourage rush on by. "Chase, this time I want you in there with him," Cuddy instructed.

"Okay, but you need to tell Cameron. She will want to know what happened. Foreman is in Philadelphia. I'll call him later."

"I'll let her know. I'll be in the observation room after I talk to her. Hell, she'll probably be there with me."

Chase gave her a 'good luck with that' expression and went into the OR to scrub in.


	8. Chapter 8

"How is he?" Wilson asked as he walked into the observation room with Cuddy.

"Not good. The infection is pretty widespread in the peritoneum. They seem to be having trouble going through it all. I'm so glad Chase caught it."

"When did you start noticing problems?"

"House started noticing something this morning and told Chase about it. He followed the proper course of action. I just didn't check in on him in time this afternoon."

"He confided in Chase? His favorite punching bag? Will wonders never cease?" Wilson always had a hard time trying to understand House's attitude toward Chase. He knew that House liked to torment those that he liked, but he didn't realize how much he had grown to trust him. He looked over to see the overwhelming concern on Cuddy's face. "Don't worry. This couldn't have been prevented."

"I was so damn focused on the ketamine that I overlooked one of the more common post op risks with his type of injury. I don't know why I pretend I'm a doctor anymore."

"You gave him ketamine?" A voice asked from behind. A stunned and annoyed Cameron stood there after hearing everything.

"Dr. Cameron, this is none of your concern." Wilson was willing to take charge of the situation since Cuddy was feeling a bit down.

"He's my boss. I have a right to know if any treatment involving possible permanent neurological side effects was performed." Cameron protested.

"No, you don't. This is a highly experimental process that House privately wanted. For the sake of the hospital, the less people that know the better." Wilson was not going to let her go on in her usual way. Not today.

"I see, so that is why he needed constant supervision. Chase was in on this?"

"At first, no." Cuddy replied. "I had to tell him though when he noticed the side effects. He was sworn to secrecy and specifically told not to tell you or Foreman."

"That was wrong..."

"Enough, Dr. Cameron." Wilson said in an authoritative tone. "The topic is no longer open to discussion."

Cameron sat on the bench silently with a pouty look on her face and her arms folded.

Wilson was pleased with her compliance. "That's better."

Together their eyes all fixed on the procedure below. The doctors were struggling to get a grasp on the amount of damage done once they were able to find the tear. They did their best to clean and drain the wound area before stitching House back up.

Cameron took a moment to observe Chase during the operation. Normally in surgery he quietly stalks in the background, jumping in calmly on the occasion that his critical care services are needed. This time though, he stood in the corner and barely moved. She could only guess what reactions were being hidden by that surgical mask, but she sensed he was personally affected by this.

When it was all done, Cameron watched Chase abruptly leave the operating room. She herself then quickly left the observation area, prompting a stare from Wilson and Cuddy.

"If I find out she went after Chase to berate him for not telling her about the ketamine, I will have to kick her ass myself." Cuddy was not putting up with crap today either.

Wilson smiled. "Chase needs to learn how to fight his own battles. He's in for a doozy."

------------------------

"Have you seen Dr. Chase?" Cameron asked an OR nurse.

"I think I saw him head into the locker area. He didn't look very happy."

Cameron entered the locker room to see a rather devastated Chase sitting on the floor in the corner, knees up, with his head down in between them.

"Chase?"

"I just need some time to myself right now," he said with a muffled voice.

"It wasn't your fault. You checked him out thoroughly and nothing indicated peritonitis. You followed the proper course of treatment."

"I wasn't thorough enough."

"I don't know how you could have known there was a GI tear when initially there was absence of fluid in the abdomen. You and Cuddy caught it in time."

"Did we? He's in critical condition and fighting an infection that kills people when untreated." Chase's voice now started to crack.

Cameron grabbed his chin and moved his head so that his eyes met hers. "It wasn't your fault."

Chase pulled his face away and went back to his downward look of shame.

"What's up Chase? This is the second time in a few months that I have seen you completely consumed by guilt over a patient. You are a doctor, not God."

Chase continued to sit silently is despondence. He certainly wasn't going to explain his grief to Cameron. He couldn't explain it to himself.

"This time I'm not taking no for an answer. We are having that drink."

Chase said nothing, but the expression on his face indicated he wasn't going anywhere.

"You are not going home like this, being left alone to wallow in your guilt and misery."

"Are you sure you aren't speaking for yourself?" Chase finally felt pushed into responding to her annoying attempt at caring.

"Maybe I am. If that is the case, we are helping each other out."

"Cameron, just go away."

"I am not leaving you alone this time. He's my boss too. We need to support each other."

She slid down the wall and took the space next to him on the floor. Chase in disgust tried to get up to leave. She grabbed his left arm and pushed him back down.

"If there is one thing I know for sure, it's that I can overpower you. Sit and we can take a little time to accept the enormity of the situation. We don't even have to talk. We can just sit here."

They sat there together in awkward silence for several minutes. Chase suddenly remembered something he had to do. "Foreman. I need to call and tell him what happened."

"Don't worry I already took care of it. He is going to try and get back late tomorrow afternoon."

They sat there for several more minutes in identical awkward silence.

"I'm thirsty." Chase said while still staring straight forward.

"Let's go," Cameron replied with a straight look on her face.

------------------

They sat down at a quiet table in a remote corner of the bar. Couples that wanted to share personal and private moments usually grabbed that table. Cameron hoped that the private area would help them relax a bit more. She noticed Chase looking very sullen and uncomfortable as they sat down.

"Chase, you should be happier. You have been trying to get me alone for a drink for a year and a half."

"We are well past that stage of cuteness. We passed that the day we slept together. Let's skip the intimacy and move straight to the sex."

"You seemed okay with it."

"I was, I mean, I am... Hell I don't know what I'm trying to say. This shouldn't mean anything."

"Okay, this means nothing. Nothing except two friends trying to share their burdens with each other. Let's face it things have been pretty crappy lately."

"I don't have much to share."

"No, you just have to carry all the burden yourself. There's no sharing that. You had to go it alone growing up, so you have to here." Cameron said sarcastically. "We are a team. What happened to House was not your fault. If anything, it is his fault for being enough of an ass to tick someone off enough to shoot him."

Chase slightly grinned at that comment. "I suppose many were wondering why it hadn't happened before."

"Exactly! See, there you go, you are looking at this using a proper perspective."

"I feel guilty because he was depending on me to help him."

"You did help him. When House wakes up, he will know it too." Cameron grabbed his hand in reassurance.

"But I..."

"Let go of it. You are always an effective doctor because you don't let yourself care too much. You can't do what you do and get personally involved. You see more death than all of us put together."

Chase pulled his hand away. "This involves someone we know. Detachment isn't that easy, remember?"

"I know this case has personal meaning, but we went through it with Foreman and we will go through it now."

"Oh, great example!" Chase was flabbergasted that she would bring that up. "If I recall, we comforted each other with another round of sex while Foreman was in a bed lingering. Twice now you have grabbed me at very vulnerable times. Will you be able to do that now that it is House?"

"Would you do it if I said yes?"

"So this friendship and comfort drink was just another trick to get me to go to bed with you again?"

Cameron paused realizing that she was upsetting him worse. "No, that was not my intention. I was vulnerable those times too."

Chase got up ready to leave.

"I'm sorry Chase; the conversation strayed. Let's start over." Cameron pleaded.

Chase looked at her with utter contempt, sat back down and took a huge gulp of beer to calm himself down. "Where do you want to start?"

"Explain soccer to me. The World Cup is coming up, right?"

"Yes. I'm surprised you knew that since no one in this country really takes any interest.

"Did you ever play?"

"You don't grow up in Australia and not play soccer."

"Isn't it football where you are from?"

"In Australia it is either soccer or football. They recently have tried to call it football to align with the rest of the world, except the US of course, but there is also Australian rules football which is something different. I grew up calling it soccer."

"I see then why Australia never advances very far in the World Cup. You're too busy not knowing what to call it."

Chase flashed a look of offense at the dig on his home country. "Oh yes, the US is loaded with plenty of international soccer superstars. I never said we were good at soccer; probably because it's a loyal tradition to have a few in the pub before playing as well as after."

He smiled and they both laughed at his observation. "So Australia is just a drunken version of us." Cameron concluded. "See, we do have something to talk about. Tell me more."

**a/n: Not much to elaborate on here. I hope you liked. The rest of the story is turning out to be pretty cool. More updates to come in the near future. **


	9. Chapter 9

**a/n: I want to thank everyone that has provided wonderful comments thus far. They have really helped in my development of this story and given me several ideas. **

**I have updated the soccer conversation at the end of chapter 8. Thanks to gypsy-butterfly for setting me straight on Australian rules football. It is great to have an Aussie keep me honest with my cultural assumptions!**

**Anyway, enjoy chapter 9 and as usual thanks for taking time to read it. **

This was getting to be a familiar sight; Dr. Wilson fast asleep by House's side in a chair offering little comfort. "Dr. Wilson." Chase started shaking him a little.

Wilson slowly opened his glassy eyes, realized who it was and then closed them again. "I'm still sleeping. Go away."

Chase smiled. Wilson was starting to get too cozy here. "Wouldn't your apartment be a little more comfortable right now?"

"Sure, a strange place with nothing but unpacked boxes everywhere. No thanks."

Chase decided it was best to leave Wilson alone and check on House. As he poured through the data from the previous evening, he found not much had changed. House still had a fever, the abdomen was badly swollen, and he was unconscious. Things weren't worse though, so that provided some relief. Chase sat in the chair next to Wilson, enjoying the brief moment of peace he used to get every morning before all this happened.

Wilson opened his eyes once again and noticed Chase next to him lost completely in deep thought. Actually, it wasn't thought. He was zoning and looked rather exhausted. "Rough night?"

"I was up until 3am talking with Cameron."

"Just talking?" Wilson asked with a prying smile. "You two didn't..."

"No!" Chase replied smacking down any hint of suggestion. "I think it was the first civilized and fun conversation we have had in a long time. Come to think of it, we never have talked like that."

"That's good to know. When House wakes up I can collect on our bet."

Chase was less than amused by Wilson's gossipy candor. "I'm not sure I want to know what this one is about."

"House said all it would take is one intense moment of stress and you two would be in each other's arms providing "physical" comfort. The key word there was "physical". Talking doesn't count, so I win."

"When did you make this bet?" Chase mentally acknowledged that House wasn't exactly wrong, but his timing could be off.

"A few weeks ago."

"Congratulations. You win your bet." Chase gave him a congratulatory pat on the shoulder.

"Ah, I can see by the look in your eyes he wasn't entirely incorrect. I'll stop there though because he was wrong for the bet I want to enjoy my rare moment of glory."

Wilson glared with astonishment the huge stack of files that Chase brought with him. "You shouldn't let those stack up like that. Want to know House's secret?"

"I think I'm too scared to know. I'm not going to become an accessory to a crime, am I?"

"He never reads the charts. He opens and signs."

Chase wasn't all that surprised. "I had a feeling that was the case. As a joke, one of the nurses slipped in a cafeteria order. When I asked her about it, she said House signed it all the time. I guess that is their little test to verify that doctors are reading what they are signing. She was impressed that I passed her test. Apparently I was the first in a long time."

"Oh, so that's how I ended up with a turkey on rye the other day. I thought someone was just being nice." Wilson spoke with a rather straight face. Chase looked at him with some disappointment, and then Wilson began to smile. "No, they tried that with me a while ago. If you pass their test, you only get it once, unless you're an ass like House, in which they do it all the time."

"I'm too new an attending to start that behavior. I can be irresponsible like House when I get some tenure."

"Suit yourself." Wilson leaned back and gave himself at big stretch. He was having a hard time with motivation this morning. "Is Foreman going to be back later?"

"Yes, and then we present the options to our patient's mother." Chase grabbed his temples. He wasn't looking forward to that conversation.

Wilson easily noticed Chase's aggravation. "I see that thought is bothering you."

"The last conversation I had with the mother was rather unnerving."

"How so?"

"She did everything she could to get me to act spiritually. She even recited a prayer to the guardian angels that has had a deep personal meaning to me for years. I'm not sure how she ended up saying that one since it isn't too common. In the end, I could swear the conversation had nothing to do about her daughter. She was focusing on me."

Wilson easily saw what had happened. "From all my experience with patient's families, I see two possible explanations for that behavior. First, she is trying to manipulate you. Maybe if she evokes a fear of God, you will in the end do what she wants. The second, she is through evangelism trying to save your soul. In this case, it is likely a combination of both."

"Have you ever had a situation where you were asked to use your faith when treating a patient?"

"I had a patient one time, an elderly Jewish woman with pancreatic cancer. Her family strictly followed the principles of Jewish medicine and were less than pleased that I was not a committed follower of Jewish law."

"If I recall correctly the Jewish law for physicians is rather strict and well spelled out."

"Yes, somewhat. With all law there is grey area. It requires that everything possible must be done for every patient in terms of preserving life, treating illness, and relieving suffering. All therapeutic decisions must be in the patient's best interests and the safest, gentlest treatment for a given condition must always be the preferred one."

"So what happened?"

"Through insistence of the patient, the family decided that being the doctor I was the ultimate authority in all medical manners and I was doing all that was possible to preserve life, which is another strict rule of the law. I managed to give her 4 more years that many thought she wouldn't have. In the end, they were grateful."

Chase nodded, glad to know that his struggle was not unique.

"How did you end up talking to the mother? I thought that was Cameron's patient?"

"Mrs. Harris got all religious on her which caused her to lose all sanity. She gave me up as the religious one."

"Ouch. I can't say that has ever happened to me before."

"Yeah well, it was stupid of me to let Cameron do it. Religion and medicine should be mutually exclusive when it comes to diagnosis and treatment."

"That is true, although there are moments when it's okay to show your faith to these families. Such a display offers comfort to them in a very troubling time and doesn't affect how you do your job. Granted, it's only an issue if you are uncomfortable with your faith. I can't help you there. Only you can draw that line."

Chase silently considered each one of Wilson's words. He was exactly right.

"Well, it is time for me to go be an Oncologist now. Don't spend too much time in here. House would see that as weakness."

"It's the best place in the world to do paperwork. I'm gone as soon as I'm done."

Wilson smiled. "Then you will be here all day. Let me know if anything changes."

-------------------

Foreman walked into the conference area with intense enthusiasm. His trip was a very productive one.

"I sense that your visit at the hospital went very well." Chase instantly noticed the excitement in Foreman's face. "Or was it the visit with the girlfriend?"

"Both actually, but the consult with Dr. Stephenson was fascinating. I was there as they implanted stimulation nodes into the brain of someone suffering from severe depression. Granted such treatment is a desperate last course, but the other person who had it done is able to function normally again for the first time in years. While this country might be reluctant to do this with coma patients, they are finding a multitude of conditions that deep brain stimulation is helping. The positive results for Parkinson's patients were inspiring."

"So what did you learn about waking people from comas?"

"The stimulation that happens itself is very simple. The tricky part is afterward. That is what we will need to discuss with the mother."

"I'll page Cameron and let her know you are back. We can all go, but I'm only there to observe since my name is on the case. You and Cameron will do all the talking, and I really hope it's mostly you. Mrs. Harris will appreciate your optimistic yet realistic views."

"I have to admit, after seeing all their techniques and promising results, I'm inspired to consider research in that field. The opportunities are huge right now."

Cameron walked in as Foreman was talking. "Research, huh? Wasn't running your own grant a dream of yours? Anyway, I'm ready to have the talk now."

"Let's go," Foreman said and all three proceeded.

----------------------

The three doctors respectfully entered the hospital room while the latest circle of friends prayed for their fallen angel. Mrs. Harris heard the slow and soft entrance and put a stop to the prayers as soon as she saw the brooding look in each one of their eyes. "We need to be alone right now," she told the others. They filed out one by one, offering a show of support to their friend as they left.

"Mrs. Harris, I just got back from visiting with a deep brain stimulation expert in Philadelphia. We have an option for you, but it requires serious consideration." Foreman delivered his words with his normal professional confidence, but he couldn't help but feel sorry for the woman looking at him with tired and terrified eyes.

He proceeded with his consultation when he could tell that despite the fear, Mrs. Harris was ready to hear everything. "We want to try a non-evasive procedure called electronic brain stimulation. Before I explain the procedure though, you are being asked for a deep commitment if you agree to this. Your daughter will be part of an experimental research study. That will require a lifetime of follow up tests, tracking and logging her progress at home, and possible further experiments. I cannot guarantee that such participation will improve her quality of life. She might feel like a lab rat and could end up resenting that. You will need to look at the bigger picture and realize all this trouble has the potential to help countless others for years to come."

Mrs. Harris was trying to keep a strong facade, but it was easy to tell that inside she was emotionally crumbling. "That is something I never considered. I'll keep that under advisement. Explain the procedure to me."

Foreman continued. "What will happen is we attach an electrified cuff to your daughter's wrist. It will send a small charge, enough for her to make her hand clench and arm tremble. The charge will be transported through the median nerve, which is a major pathway to the brain. She will get two one to two hour sessions a day. If there are any positive results, you may not see them for at least a week or more."

"That sounds rather simple. I can tell from your look though that it is anything but. What bad can happen from this?"

"Since she has already had a subdural hematoma, she is at a greater risk of bleeding in the brain or stroke. Also, with any type of stimulation, any brain function is at risk of deteriorating. Messing with the brain produces often unpredictable results."

Mrs. Harris nodded, thus indicating that she understood all the information she was trying to process. "What good can come from this, other than waking from the coma?"

"Studies have shown overall improved brain function. Results vary from case to case, but the general trend is improvement in all aspects of brain activity."

"What if I don't do this and take my chances with the coma?"

Foreman didn't hesitate to answer, but his expression changed to a more somber feel. "She will need to be transferred to a brain injury rehabilitation facility for proper follow up care."

Mrs. Harris immediately broke out in tears. She personally knew what that meant. "Those centers don't try to help their patients. I saw my Uncle rot in one of those places. I can't let her go there. She is too young to be written off. You should try the brain stimulation."

Cameron decided it was time to intervene given the desperation level. "Mrs. Harris. Statistics show that many of the brain injured awake within a year. You don't have to do this now. You have time."

"Are there any other options if this doesn't work?" Mrs. Harris asked as she gained control of her malaise.

Foreman answered. "There are more aggressive therapies. Japanese researchers have been implanting electrodes at the base of the skull and transport constant signals between a cuff on the arm and the electrodes. They have been able to wake patients that have been in a persistive vegetative state for years. The technology keeps getting better."

"Luckily, your daughter isn't that bad yet where such aggressive treatment is needed." Cameron added with her usual empathetic tone. "You don't have to rush into any option."

"So, the only question is should I do this now, or wait?"

Cameron nodded.

Mrs. Harris turned away and stared at her helpless child lingering in the bed. "I need time to think and pray. I will let you know what I decide."

The three ducklings empathetically respected her wishes and wordlessly gathered toward the door.

"Dr. Chase."

Chase had stood quietly and respectfully in the background the entire time intentionally avoiding the discussion. He only wanted to intervene if he was needed. "Yes Mrs. Harris."

"I'm not asking this from you as the doctor, but from you as a humble servant. Would you please pray with me?"

"I'm not sure..."

"Please." Mrs. Harris turned around and gazed at him intently.

Chase looked into her desperate eyes and knew she needed someone. He silently nodded in acceptance of her request. The other two doctors left to leave them alone.

Mrs. Harris grabbed his hand and they bowed their heads. She tried to speak her words, but found herself at a complete loss. She started sobbing.

"I don't know what to pray for anymore. I'll confess, I've been cheating lately. I'm supposed to pray to God for strength and to accept his will and mercy. In reality though, the entire time I'm praying the way I'm supposed to, I'm secretly wishing she will live. God knows it, he sees it. He sees right through me."

"I don't think he blames you for not wanting to let go."

"I'm having trouble seeing God's purpose for this. Maybe it is because I'm tired and emotionally exhausted. If God wanted me to let her go, she would have died by now, right? She has been kept alive for a reason. If you asked me two days ago about the procedure, I wouldn't have even hesitated with an answer. I don't know what has changed."

Chase completely understood what was happening. "The reality of the situation has changed. Waiting tends to force the mind to think things through."

"So God has chosen her then for a lifelong science experiment? The years of soccer games and dance recitals all come down to this? What other reason could there be?"

Chase wasn't sure if he should mention this to her confused state of mind, but there was one other reason. "Sometimes these things happen as a test of faith."

Mrs. Harris got a stunned expression and sank down into a nearby chair. "I have never wanted to consider it. Nothing in my heart could think that. I'm blindsided by love of my child though. Tell me, as an outside observer, do you think all this could just my test?"

Chase looked into Mrs. Harris' heartbroken eyes and then over to the little girl in a peaceful slumber. He suddenly realized that he was wrong. There was more to this. "No, this is not just your test."

She drew a long stuttered breath and realized at that moment what she must do.

"We will proceed with the brain stimulation now." A soft flow of tears started running down her cheeks.

"I'll let Dr. Cameron and Dr. Foreman know."

"Please Dr. Chase, keep praying to the guardian angels for me. I think I'm scaring them away."

He smiled at her ability to find even the slightest humor in this intense situation. "Don't worry. The angels would never leave Emily. She is too precious a soul to them, and to you."


	10. Chapter 10

**a/n: I deeply apologize to all those following this story for my delay in between updates. I had this written a week ago but ended up running with another burst of inspiration on another story. Anyway, it is my goal this week to complete this story, thus completing the series as well. Happy reading!**

_Who knows what I'm doing here or why I care so much. Probably because it is my nature to care, but you and I both know it is something more. I just never have been able to explore what that something more is. What I originally mistook for love turned out to be nothing more than a crush much like a student fawning over a professor. The student falls for the brilliance and would like to believe there is something more behind that virtuosity. Sadly in most cases, the student eventually finds there isn't._

_We are all damaged House, not just you. You believed that I wanted to fix you. Hell, I believed it too at first. I have learned though that I can't fix myself, let alone you. I can't even fix my medical career. The grey lines that you have so painfully shown me have taught me that anything I once held dear really doesn't exist. There is no right or wrong, black or white, strong or weak, and broken or unbroken. _

_I confess though, you weren't the one to finally get through to me. I was too stubborn and blind to see your motives of needing to blow apart my reality. Foreman and Chase were the culprits. Each in their own broken ways showed me the cruelty of this profession. I'm not sure how they saw it from day one and I didn't. Probably because life has taught them to be emotionally distant and they have used that to their distinct advantage. Either that or medicine is truly a man's world. No, I'd actually believe that if it wasn't for Cuddy. She has more balls that all of you men put together. _

_I don't love anyone nor do I want to love anyone. I was attracted to you for your mind and Chase for his body, but both those moments are over. Chase actually had the nerve to tell me that none of us are happy. He's right, but that doesn't mean that we aren't capable of being happy. Foreman is trying, so I will too. My first step is letting go. We would be the most miserable couple in history. I'm letting go of you and choosing to become the doctor I'm supposed to be. I'm going to jump onto those grey lines and try to make sense of them._

Cameron's pager went off. Foreman was letting her know it was time for the brain stimulation. As she got up she took one more lingering look at her mentor. _Get well House. No matter what I resolve to do, I will always care. _

_--------------_

Chase wanted to slip in and quickly speak to Mrs. Harris before Foreman got started. He was relieved to find her alone, holding vigil over Emily.

"I brought a good luck charm." From his pocket he pulled out a necklace with a small sterling silver medal hanging from it. Mrs. Harris examined the likeness imprinted on it. "St. Rita?"

"She is the patron saint of impossible cases. 'Let me suffer like you, Divine Saviour' she said one day and suddenly one of the thorns from the crucifix struck her on the forehead. It left a deep wound that did not heal and caused much suffering for the rest if her life. Her injuries were considered by her to be a most treasured and singular gift of god."

Mrs. Harris clutched the medal as if someone had given her a pot of gold. She put her head down and let the emotions overcome her. "Thank you. I will treasure this forever."

"I'm sorry, but I have other priorities I must get to. Good luck. I'll check in with you later."

Chase passed Foreman on the way out. "All yours."

"Ready Mrs. Harris?" Foreman asked as he noticed tears running from her eyes. He was curious about what Chase said to her, but knew not to ask.

She rubbed the medal between her fingers and nodded. "Yes, we are more than ready."

------------

Natalie was in the ICU performing her routine check on House when Chase came in with his now trademark stack of files. "You're going to hide here with your paperwork again I see."

"I'll be in here all the time from now on. I'll even assign myself ICU patients in the future. This place is better than any office. You'll just have to put up with this face for a while."

Natalie observed Chase getting settled. She found his slight angst over his menial tasks to be quite endearing. "Oh yes, there is nothing worse than attractive young doctors hanging out in the ICU." Chase smiled bashfully at her comment but said nothing. "I know you are busy, but I just have to know something."

"Sure, what is it?" Chase was rather curious. Natalie was usually not the inquisitive type.

"Why do you put up with House? No one doubts his brilliance but personally given his behavior, I don't think he is worth the trouble."

"House is making me a better doctor."

"He is not making you a better person," Natalie countered. "Cynicism and crankiness don't improve your medical skills."

Chase shrugged off her observation. "I've learned to filter through all the bad stuff. I just don't let it bother me."

Natalie wasn't the kind to tolerate such passive behavior either. "It bothers me. Decent people don't deserve to be treated that way. It isn't just you. Once upon a time I actually liked Dr. Cameron as a person. In her time under House she has turned into a mean spirited bitch."

"Our team works very well together. There are no rules that say you have to be nice." Chase defended.

"Yeah, if that is the case, then why are you still nice? You treat patients, their families, and the nurses with huge respect. You are the only thoughtful person left on that team."

"I'm not nice. I'm polite. Anyway, House challenges me and I like it."

Natalie got a cute little grin. She felt it would be a great opportunity to push a few buttons. "That sounds like self punishing behavior. What is your shame?"

Chase wasn't sure whether to be pissed or amused by her attitude. For whatever bizarre reason, he was actually intrigued by her playful nosiness. He wasn't about to answer her question though. "Now you are getting too personal."

Natalie let a small smile slip that indicated she was indeed having fun with him. "You don't need to tell me. I have a feeling though that House knows exactly what your shame is and is using it as emotional blackmail. It all makes sense now."

Now it was Chase's turn to do some mocking. "I think you and House would make an ideal pair. You both could go around together and psychoanalyze everyone in the hospital. It is a match made in heaven."

Natalie got a huge and flirtatious smile. "Not my type. I like my doctors younger, cuter, and foreign."

Chase blushed at her comment and knew she was up to something. He decided to play along. "Now you are just plain teasing me. Didn't you just say something about showing people respect?"

"I like to have a general idea of what types of demons are haunting the doctors I'm going to have a drink with."

"You want to have a drink with me?" Chase was very surprised.

"No, you want to have a drink with me."

He stared at her, uncertain what to say next.

"Come on," she said, "Spit it out. Natalie will you..."

"...have a drink with me?" Chase finished her sentence as she had hoped.

She smiled showing deep flattery in her expression. "Yes, I'd love to." Then she turned and exited the room.

Chase sat there pleasantly stunned trying to figure out how he just got a date out of that.

"Sure, flirt with a hot nurse in front of the coma patient. He won't notice." Chase looked up to notice a wide awake House giving him a taunting smile.

"You weren't in a coma."

"That makes it even worse! She thinks you are actually nice. Boy did she get that wrong."

"So you heard everything." Chase grabbed his forehead in slight humiliation.

"Yep, pretty much. We need to put Cameron and Nancy there in a steel cage together for a death match."

"Natalie."

"Whatever. I'll put my money on Cameron. She may be tiny but she fights dirty."

Chase looked at House rather un-amused by the whole suggestion.

"No?" House asked, retreating from his excitement. "Suit yourself. For the record, you were self-punishing the day I hired you. I haven't done anything to you that hadn't already been done. I just think it is fun after all this time I can still get away with everything I do to you."

"Have you ever thought that someday I might snap and bring a machine gun to work?"

"Nah, you are too nice. You would apologize for making a mess and clean it up."

Chase gave House the evil eye. "You're right. Someday I'll just slip something into your drink. Far less messy."

"That's the spirit; use that creativity that got you hired. By the way, I'm fine, thanks for asking."

"What do I care?" Chase replied. "I'm not nice."

Chase left the room, leaving House highly amused by the situation. Even while sick in the ICU, he could still push buttons.

----------

A week later the ducklings were finally allowed back into their regular diagnostics home. They all went in together, each taking their own moment to reflect on what had happened last time they were there.

"Feels weird, doesn't it?" Cameron looked at the stain in the carpet that stood now as their constant reminder of the horrific event.

"Yeah," replied Foreman who really didn't want to dwell on it too much.

Chase didn't waste anytime. After taking his one second of reflection, he started making coffee right away. The other two took that to be a sign that it was time to get back to business.

"Has anyone heard from House since he went home?" Cameron asked.

"Nope," replied Chase, "and I doubt we will. He will be doing some strict rehab for the next 8 weeks and doesn't want to be disturbed. I'm not sure Wilson will even get to see him."

"Wilson should feel really lucky then." Foreman added.

All three pagers went off in mismatched patterns. As they checked their messages, Cameron looked the most panicked. "Emily." They all rushed out.

A few minutes later they shuffled into Emily's room and were astounded by what they saw. Foreman ran to the bedside while Cameron and Chase stayed behind still frozen in disbelief.

"Emily?" Foreman asked as two large blue eyes stared at him. He put his hand on top of her right hand, and she proceeded to weakly grab it. Foreman threw her an encouraging smile, and she ever so slightly allowed her lips to move upward. An attempt to smile at this stage was more than he could have hoped for. He looked over at Mrs. Harris, who wore a simple look of overwhelming relief.

"Thank you Dr. Foreman." Mrs. Harris' voice quivered as she fought back tears. She wanted to be strong for Emily. "You did it."

"No Mrs. Harris. She did it."

Cameron let tears slide down her cheeks at this incredible sight. Chase tried to show as little reaction as possible, but inside he felt a rush of emotion that he hadn't experienced in a long time. He was on the brink of being completely overtaken.

"Chase?" Foreman asked.

Chase cleared the lump in his throat and replied in a shaky voice. "Yes?"

"Can you help me do a reflex check?"

He nodded, snapped back into doctor mode, and went to help Foreman.

"I'll let you do your exam. I'm off to the chapel to give my thanks to St. Rita." Mrs. Harris quickly left.

Cameron and Foreman looked at each other confused, and then both noticed a smiling Chase. Cameron smiled too. It maybe a God thing, but it was all good.

**a/n: One more chapter to go. It will be out rather soon. Thanks again for your patience between updates. **


	11. Chapter 11

_Had four months already passed?_ Cameron thought as she headed toward the office for their scheduled meeting. What a very strange four months to say the least. It seemed like only yesterday that House came back from his recovery, but it indeed had been a month.

She arrived at the office and was shocked to see House actually there ready to start. "What, no attempts to make me wait this time?"

House smiled. "No, you have waited for this long enough. Here is your final assessment." He handed her the packet of papers, vaguely reminiscent of the last review.

Cameron started flipping through the pages. A huge surprised smile fell on her face. "This is perfect."

"Yep. It's that whole justification for a position thing again."

"How much is your bet with Wilson this time?"

"No wager. Wilson couldn't afford it since he has another divorce to pay for."

Cameron laughed. "Strange, Chase told me he actually won the last bet. I would have thought his confidence would be riding high."

"Yeah, that was partially your fault. Don't think I will forget that." House walked over to his desk and grabbed another sheet of paper prepared for her. "I need to warn you before I give you this; your extra page is a little different than Chase's was." He handed her the letter.

Cameron as expected was shocked by the contents. "The Department of Medicine wants me as their Specialist of Diagnostic Immunology? Don't I need a few more years experience for that title?"

"Usually, but your background is top notch. They have a desperate full time need there and you are the most qualified. I wanted to keep you, but I also couldn't hold you back from something like this."

Cameron was amazed after all this time to actually be getting some validation. "I don't know what to say. Yes, I accept. What's this about part of the position being allocated to other departments?"

"You are required to spend no more than 25 percent of your time consulting on cases for other departments for your specialty. Right now, that 25 percent is exclusively allocated to the two attendings and one fellow of the Department of Diagnostics."

"So you aren't losing me completely." Cameron said smiling.

"I just couldn't give you up freely. I had to get something for it. Anyway, your first task in your consulting time will be to help me find two new fellows. You and Chase are responsible for screening, I make the final decisions. I hate interviewing."

"Okay."

"That's it? Nothing like 'oh House you are such an ass' or you spewing saucy words that makes me feel all weird? I like it when you go all belligerent on me."

"Sorry, you aren't my boss anymore. It's not worth the trouble."

"Your replacement better be feisty then. I have put that in the job descriptions. Someone that has to provide me with amusement. I'm sure Chase will find a nice looking female to keep the sexual tension going."

Cameron gave him a pleasing smile and said nothing.

"Wow, that's the first time I have left you speechless. Why did I not figure out how to do this until now? Now off, I hate long goodbyes."

Cameron silently walked away while House's eyes fixed themselves adoringly on her every move. _It would never worked between us_, he thought and went back to work.

-------------

Foreman entered the diagnostics conference room where Chase was doing his crossword. Ever since House returned from leave the paperwork monster was gone. Foreman had to admit, Chase was happier since he got his crossword time back.

"Got a minute?" Foreman asked Chase.

"Sure, I need to stop anyway. I can't remember the six letter word for tone deafness."

"Asonia." Foreman quickly answered.

"Ah, that's it." Chase entered the word and put his crossword down. "Anyway, what do you need to talk about?"

"I just came from Cuddy's office. My RFP for the brain stimulation studies and research has been approved by the university. They found enough foundation and grant money to approve the funding at 100 percent."

"Foreman, that's fantastic! Congratulations. So when do you get to start?" Chase was deeply thrilled for him.

"Technically, it started four months ago with Emily Harris. She's the reason the proposal got approved. Her progress has been astounding. There is enough financing for the next two years, starting today."

"Today? Wow, what did House say when you told him?"

"I haven't told him. Cameron doesn't know either."

"I'm the first to know?" Chase was amazed that Foreman would choose to tell him before anyone.

"Yep. You want to know why, and it's not because you were the only one here."

Chase nodded curiously.

"I knew you would be the only one genuinely happy for me. That and I have grown to respect you greatly as a doctor over the last several months. You are alright Chase."

Chase held out his hand and offered a shake of good fortune. "Good luck man. It has been an honor."

Foreman accepted his gesture along with a big smile. "Thanks. I better go tell Cameron and House now."

Chase smiled and thought about how much of a pain in the ass Foreman was at first. He eventually turned out to be a great colleague. He was actually going to miss him.

----------------

Foreman, Cameron and Chase were back at their usual hangout enjoying another celebration. "Pamela should be here any minute." Foreman said. "You both will really like her."

Sure enough, a young, well-dressed, very attractive black woman entered the bar. Foreman flagged her down and she made her way over to the table.

"I'm so glad you could make it." Foreman said as he gave her a kiss.

"Miss your big celebration? What kind of a girlfriend do you think I am?"

"It isn't just my celebration. This is Dr. Cameron. She is now a Specialist in Diagnostic Immunology."

"Nice to meet you and congratulations." Then she turned back to Foreman. "Who's the cute blond guy?"

"Robert Chase, nice to meet you." Chase said as he shook her hand.

"Ooh, nice accent. You're from Melbourne."

Chase was surprised by her catch. "Yes, I am, or just outside of there."

"I'm in marketing. We did an extensive Australian campaign last year. I painfully learned about all the accent differences in your country, especially Melbourne vs. Sydney. Who would have known? Aussie all sounds the same to me."

"The same can be said with you Yankees." Chase replied in kind.

They all sat down and Pamela ordered a beer. "So, these are the people you have shared your torture with the last two years."

"It's hard to believe that is all changing now." Cameron reflected.

"It's hard to believe you all aren't relieved," Pamela replied. "What does your dad call him Eric, oh yes, 'that miserable bastard.'"

"That miserable bastard is still my boss." Chase interjected.

"It won't be long before we are calling Chase the same thing." Foreman added with a light chuckle.

"So did you guys at least learn anything in your time with Dr. House?" Pamela was fascinated by the notion that anyone was willing to put up with such a jerk for so long.

Chase smiled. "Other than everybody lies?"

"Sex kills," said Cameron.

"Vicodin is the answer." Foreman added.

They all shared a round of laughter at the expense of their eccentric mentor. Cameron showed her devious smile indicating it was time again for one of her little games. "How about, what I learned from House, rapid fire style. We each take a turn and fire off the first thing that comes to our heads. Chase, you start."

"Why me?"

"Because you have been with him the longest." Foreman showed his own malevolent grin.

"Okay, uh..." Chase was trying to think of something quickly. He could do this easily with medical conditions, so he wasn't sure why he couldn't come up with anything about House. Then something flashed in his mind. "If you are trying to do the right thing, you can do whatever you want no matter how dangerous or completely insane."

"No matter what you are doing, you can say whatever you want." Cameron was already prepared for her quips.

"If you piss off enough of your patients, it's time to wear a bullet proof vest to work."

Foreman's comment got huge snickers from everyone at the table. After calming down, they all looked at Chase to start all over again.

"If you are an anti-social ill-mannered loner, rats make ideal pets."

"One can see music after dropping acid."

"General Hospital sucks." Everyone looked at Foreman with disapproval. "What, you all actually like that dreck? I'm more of a Days of Our Lives man myself." They all again laughed knowing that he was exactly right.

Chase had more to add. "No, it's really bad, and that's saying a lot given that the Aussie soaps are the worst in the world. Thankfully House doesn't have access to Neighbours. We all would be cringing."

"Come on Chase, you're up." Cameron said wanting to move things along.

"Cane twirling is an art."

"The more complex the language, the better the Medical journals."

"There are endless possibilities when you have the right balls in your office."

Chase started over again. "It's okay to taunt and sexually harass your boss, for she will go to the ends of the earth to save your job anyway."

"Torturing your best friend and making his life completely miserable is the ideal way of showing you care."

"Acts of self-destruction can provide hours of amusement for all involved."

"Having no personal life gives you the authority to interfere in everyone else's."

"Sports metaphors are our friends."

"There's me in team if you mix it all up."

They all stopped to laugh again. The exercise was making them too slap happy. Chase tried to continue, but opened his mouth and then cracked into more laughter. "I've got nothing."

"Come on, you have to have something." Cameron prodded.

"How about a man can treat everyone around him like dirt and the women that work with him will still fall in love with him."

"Hey!" Cameron replied offended by that remark. Both Foreman and Chase flashed her looks that she needed a reality check.

"Okay, how about it is really easy to torture doctors known to be stupid."

Foreman and Chase both responded with a highly amused "oooh" over her weak zinger. "I know you can insult better than that," Chase said. "Foreman, what do you have?"

Foreman looked directly at Cameron. "Fear trumps anal every time."

Cameron didn't like the new twist. "Okay, we are done."

"Wow, you guys turn on each other like this all the time?" Pamela asked in amazement.

"Only in fun dear." Foreman smiled reassuringly. "You see, we are all good now." Cameron and Chase both nodded with smiles in agreement as they enjoyed another drink of beer.

"You guys had to have had the strangest work environment that has ever existed." Pamela said.

Chase raised his glass in a toast, "To Princeton Plainsboro Diagnostics. The sorriest, most miserable, most dysfunctional team on the planet."

The others raised their glasses in kind. "Here, here," Foreman added. "To the sorriest, most miserable, most dysfunctional, and most talented team on the planet."

Cameron, Chase, and Foreman paused to give each other smiles of complete gratitude and then drank in remembrance of their time together. "One more toast." Cameron said. Somehow, they all knew exactly what it would be for and said in unison, "To House."

The End

**a/n: Gold stars to anyone who caught the inside joke in this chapter. See chapter 12 for some lengthy commentary from me about the entire series, otherwise, thanks for reading!**


	12. Chapter 12

Thank you to all that have stuck with me throughout not only this story, but the entire series. I am ending this series as of right now. I don't see how I can continue it without the team being together. Who knows though, I might get some crazy idea and find a way to continue it anyway. Not anytime soon though.

I thought I would provide a few personal comments on each of the stories. Luckily, it you don't want to read about it, you can go ahead and close this chapter now.

The House Assessment is easily my favorite of all of my stories (and judging by all the reactions I have gotten, many agree). After spending one very boring afternoon at work on the TWOP boards reading about speculation as to what would happen if the fellowships ended, I wrote this. It turned out way better than I could have hoped. Chase angst is my favorite thing to write about and I was thrilled that it was in the bounds of this story to allow that to happen. Also, it provided me with a vehicle that I like to use throughout all my stories, character growth.

Adverse Conditions had to be done since it was the continuation of Chase as an attending and actually having to run a case. I enjoyed this story, but it was a hard one to write. The POTW, Estelle, was based on an actual real someone I know (except the solution. There sadly is no solution yet). My absolute favorite part of this story, and one that I still dream about happening on the show, is Chase and Wilson having a beer. I might end up writing an entire string of stories where they have beers until it happens. My other favorite parts; the Chase smackdown of Foreman and the Cuddy smackdown of Cameron. Those are also things I would love to see on the show, although we have gotten some small hints this season with Cuddy and Cameron, so there is hope.

No Matter's purpose was to show growth and resolution for all the ducklings, especially when House was not around, but to primarily focus on Chase's personal growth (Adverse Conditions focused on his professional growth). I really ticked off some people with the religious scenes, but if Chase doesn't reconcile his religious past even just a little, how does he grow? This story was freaking impossible to write. I would have bursts of inspiration here and there, but the progress on this one was much slower. In the end though, I'm pleased with the result.

I wrote myself into a corner with Adverse Conditions. I had that scene where House boldly predicted that Chase and Cameron would sleep together again. I had every intention of that happening in No Matter, but it wrote better with Chase resisting Cameron instead of falling again to her emotional blackmail. So, I invented another experience in the past to reconcile that. Another thing that I started in a House Assessment that I had to resolve in No Matter was what was going to happen to Cameron and Foreman. I hope the outcome was satisfactory.

My favorite part of No Matter easily was the Cuddy/Chase scenes. None of that has happened on the show either, and given the fact that I still haven't seen the Chase and Wilson beer, I'm definitely not holding out hope for Cuddy/Chase moments. I also liked Chase finally not putting up with Cameron's crap anymore. Man, do I wish that would happen on the show. Her treatment of him is getting maddening. I am also very anti House/Cameron and put an end to that in this story if anything for my own personal enjoyment.

All that brain stimulation stuff is very real, as are rare cases of a bullet fragments in the brain ending up in other parts of the body. Google is my friend.

Doesn't everyone think Foreman is a better person when he's getting laid? I really didn't want him to be boring or background noise like he has been on the show, but I find Foreman hard to write (Cameron is impossible). I hope I served my purpose here.

My ultimate goal of this entire series though was to push Chase toward the character growth and potential that has so far been sadly squandered by the show. I feel satisfied and I certainly hope all that adore Chase as much as I do feel the same way.

Again, thanks for reading these nice long stories and sending your wonderful and supportive comments. It has been a fantastic experience.


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